the present time, PIG is not actively seeking full or part-time
employees, but don't run off, just yet.
general correspondence, questions, comments, complaints,
criticism, hate mail, praise, submit written and graphic
material for publication, business or advertising info:
submissions are subject to screening prior to posting. The
opinions of contributors' may not necessarily reflect those
No. Discretion? Yes. PIG
does not advocate violence or racial supremacy against any
individual or group (except Bin Laden, Al Queda, and other
assorted scum, they know who they are).
are not an extremist or militant organization - although
politically correct Liberals would probably disagree - by
mainstream standards, and have no affiliations with such
groups. We do not hide behind white sheets or hoods, nor
are we craven cowards seeking shelter in a gang, group or
tribal identity. We do, however, satirize those so inclined
to do so.
will not publish or advertise pornographic, or X-rated material.
- The Politically Incorrect Gazette is a satirical on-line
publication. We won't insult our readers' intelligence by
spelling everything out for them. We allow our readers to
figure out for themselves what is satirical and what is
- The Politically Incorrect Gazette uses material collected
from many diverse sources. We cannot verify the source of
much of the material, as it arrives via the Internet. If
we have material that is copyright protected, please contact
us, with verification of intellectual/creative ownership,
and we will promptly remove said piece from PIG, or give
we're not hiring, PIG offers its most creative readers a way to
become a PIG Contributor.
you're up to here with political correctness and need to vent before
you go postal, you'll be thrilled spitless when you visit our rough
and tumble exercise in First Amendment protected free speech: The
PIGPEN. Be warned, the PIGPEN isn't for sissies; you'll need a full
set of NAD's and asbestos knickers, because it gets very hot in
this full-contact free speech zone.
you're an unsung illustrator, artist, photomanipulator, or cartoonist
whose secret politically incorrect portfolio is too real for a conventional
publication, we strongly urge you to check out our PIGPEN
you're a closet writer whose scribblings are steeped in political
incorrectness...If your satirical prose is seeking a suitable forum,
we insist that you check out our PIGPEN
a regular contributor has several advantages. First, it gets your
politically incorrect material published on the Internet. Second,
as a regular contributor, you'll be the first to be considered when
PIG needs new members for our staff. Third, each item we print earns
you 'credits' toward a Degree from the PIG Academy. Fourth, as a
regular contributor, you could earn a regular gig as a freelance
columnist, illustrator or cartoonist. Fifth, you get to add the
Politically Incorrect Gazette to your publishing credits, a high
honor that only the select few earn.
me to the PIGPEN
before I scream.
It is advised that you come to work dressed according to your
salary. If we see you wearing $350 Prada sneakers and carrying
a $600 Gucci Bag, we assume you are doing well financially and
therefore you do not need a raise. If you dress poorly, you need
to learn to manage your money better, so that you may buy nicer
clothes, and therefore you do not need a raise. If you dress somewhere
in-between, you are right where you need to be and therefore you
do not need a raise.
We will no longer accept a doctor's statement as proof of sickness.
If you are able to go to the doctor, you are able to come to
Each employee will receive 104 personal days a year. They are
called Saturday and Sunday.
This is no excuse for missing work. There is nothing you can
do for dead friends, relatives or co-workers. Every effort should
be made to have non-employees attend to the arrangements. In
rare cases where employee involvement is necessary, the funeral
should be scheduled in the late afternoon. We will be glad to
allow you to work through your lunch hour and subsequently leave
one hour early.
Entirely too much time is being spent in the restroom. There
is now a strict 3 minute time limit in the stalls. At the end
of three minutes, an alarm will sound, the toilet paper roll
will retract, the stall door will open and a picture will be
taken. After your second offense, your picture will be posted
on the company bulletin board under the "Chronic Offenders"
Skinny people get 30 minutes for lunch as they need to eat more,
so that they can look healthy. Normal size people get 15 minutes
for lunch to get a balanced meal to maintain their average figure.
Fat people get 5 minutes for lunch, because that's all the time
needed to drink a Slim Fast.
Thank you for your loyalty to our company. We are here to provide
a positive employment experience. Therefore, all questions,
comments, concerns, complaints, frustrations, irritations, aggravations,
insinuations, allegations, accusations, contemplations, consternation,
and input should be directed elsewhere.
PRO-CHOICE HIRING POLICY: NO IRISH NEED APPLY
seeks excellence in all areas of our venture. When the time comes
when PIG does seek qualified talent, one's ethnicity, race, orientation,
gender, victim status, eye color, shoe size or background will
be of no concern, and will not guarantee a spot on our staff.
is not bound by any strain of politically correct, government
enforced hiring quotas, affirmative action, tokenism, or any
other form of legalized discrimination, i.e., Leftist racial
will never lower our standards to soothe any self-proclaimed,
government protected, properly-hyphenated, "oppressed" groups.
opinion is that when you take the "E" out of Equality, that which
remains is Quality. And that is why it is our policy to hire and
associate with candidates who are best qualified based on merit
and character, (except for Irish) without allowing the nonessential
factors to influence our decision. We are a Pro-Choice publication
in the sense that PIG celebrates our constitutional right to freedom
of association. That said, we make absolutely no apologies for the
fact that yes indeed folks... we are discriminate, we do discriminate,
because we can discriminate.