Day Angst At Chico State
Source: Chico Enterprise Record (Mexifornia)
capitalists skulking within two Chico (Mexifornia) restaurants incurred
Sombrero Stomping wrath when they had the audacity to - gasp - advertise
Caesar Chavez Day specials. How dare they commercialize this Korrectnik
holiday? We're shocked, and so are the usual suspects. Spearheading
the Chavez Day whine-a-thon, MEChA meatheads found the restaurants'
ads unremittingly "demeaning". For those who obsess on
such things, here are the fun facts about the ads that launched
Chico State (a Mexifornia Ivory Tower) Ethnocrats:
Bar's ad "shows a busty woman picking fruit and offers discounted
drinks to people wearing sombreros."
of the Grill's ad offers thirsty patrons "discounts on tequila
shots and a brand of Mexican beer"
Ethnocrats reached orbital velocity when they noted that these dastardly,
spelling-challenged capitalists misspelled the honoree's name. Unapologetically
amused - in the extreme - PIG, eagerly, doff's its sombrero to honor
Normal Street Bar and Bunz Thrill of the Grill for their courage
under Ethnocrat fire. Breaking news: Political Incorrectness is
alive and well in Chico, Mexifornia. Can we get a rousing "Ole"
from the congregation? Probably not.
Thrill Campus Korrectniks
Source: Pagan Scribbler News Wire
College Republicans are at it again. Determined to commemorate Michigan's
Cesar E. Chavez Day - celebrated on March 31 - Western Michigan
University's college pachyderms declared Thursday, March 31, 2005
"America First Day" and invited conservative icon, Patrick
J. Buchanan to give them a rousing, on campus, speech about stemming
the border jumping scumbag tide. That primal scream you just heard
coming from the Wolverine State emanates from campus Korrectniks
who are so thrilled by the news they can't find the right words.
Western Michigan University's college pachyderms for their inspired,
in-your-face, hall of fame caliber, political incorrectness. If
anyone has a spare poster advertising this event - we're especially
fond of the one that reads "Viva Buchanan! Celebrate Cesar
Chavez Day with Pat Buchanan" - send it our way we'll hang
it in a place of honor in our editorial offices.
Conservative icon, Pat Buchanan earned a Immigration War Purple
Heart, during his appearance at Western Michigan University yesterday.
Campus Korrectniks showed their true colors when a so-called 'student',
bombarded Mr. Buchanan with salad dressing during a post-speech
question and answer session.
he's a bigger - and better - man than this cringing, campus cretin
will ever be, Mr. Buchanan decided not to press felony charges.
PIG salutes Pat Buchanan for his courage under fire.
GLAAD BAAG Hissy Fit
Source: Harvard Crimson (Harvard's student fishwrap)
terms and definitions are required for this piece:
Gay and Lesbian Alliance of Annoying Dykes Boys And Alleged Girls*.
*Alleged Girls covers: bi, tri, quadra, poly, and transexuals, plus
Source: Standard PIG prose
Any word, image or action which implies that standard sexual relationships
are only between males and females
Source: New Korrectnik term used by GLAAD BAAGs
Are we all
on the same page now, Sparky?]
When Jada Pinkett
Smith - wife of film star Will Smith - arrived on campus to accept
the Harvard Foundation for Intercultural and Race Relations "Artist
of the Year" award, her ensuing, award accepting, prattle put
certain pink triangle, differently-sexual, knickers in a hyper twist.
The instant Jada finished her speech, a campus GLAAD BAAG cabal
- Bisexual, Gay, Lesbian, Transgender and Supporters Alliance (BGLTSA)
- went Korrectnik bonkers because "some of Pinkett Smith's
remarks concerning appropriate gender roles were specific to heterosexual
relationships" (Crimson). A heterosexual female who
is happily married to a heterosexual male discusses relationships
in heterosexual terms! They're shocked, shocked, I tell you that
such insensitivity is allowed to occur at this fabled Ivory Tower
where - gasp - hypersensitive, GLAAD BAAG whiners might hear it.
And what, you
ask, did Jada say that set off this Korrectnik crisis at Harvard?
The Tongue Tied Internet site cited the following example:
you can have it all — a loving man, devoted husband, loving
children, a fabulous career ... You can do whatever it is you
How dare she
say that at Harvard? How dare she dispense life lessons on how to
maintain a happy marriage with a...man? Something must be
done and right damn now. Fear not, devoted reader, Harvard's Korrectnik
horde is all over it. Faster than warp speed sissy spit, Jada's
harmless, commonsense, remarks on her life and marriage generated
a full blown, Korrectnik crisis:
(henceforth called "the Whiners") issued a press release
demanding an apology from the Foundation (henceforth called "the
Ethnocrats) for Jada's "insensitive", "heteronormative"
immediately, agreed to meetings with the Whiners to "address
concerns" resulting from Jada's remarks.
promised to issue a letter apologizing to the Whiners for any
offense caused by Jada's heteronormative prattle.
pledged to warn future speakers that Harvard University is riddled
with hypersensitive Korrectnik asshats who wear their "race,
ethnicity, religion, sexuality, gender and class" on their
sleeve, so any aspiring speaker should censor his, her, hisher,
or its prattle accordingly. So far, the only verbiage getting
universal approval from all campus Korrectniks are: "Hello"
and "Goodbye". "Thank you" is still being
and Ethnocrats will "kiss and make up" at a forthcoming
joint breakfast then a forum where all the usual campus Korrectnik
groups can spout their victimhood drivel.
By now, some
of you - and we both know who you are - will be accusing your favorite
pagan scribbler of exaggerating. Since I feel your pain, I offer
the following quotes from this Harvard Crimson piece to expose this
Korrectnik furor in all its fetid glory:
co-chair, Jordon B. Woods:
"Some of the content was extremely heteronormative, and made
BGLTSA members feel uncomfortable. Our position is that the comments
weren’t homophobic, but the content was specific to male-female
Whiner co-chair, Margaret C. D. Barusch:
"I think the comments had a very strong focus for an extended
period of time on how to effectively be in a relationship—a
heterosexual relationship. I don’t think she meant to be
offensive but I just don’t think she was that thoughtful."
co-chair Yannis M. Paulus:
"Pinkett Smith was just giving the story of her life. She
just told things from her perspective, and her perspective was
a heterosexual perspective. She wasn’t trying to be offensive.
But some felt she was taking a narrow view, and some people felt
As usual, this
pagan scribbler has several points to make about Harvard's asinine,
no longer teach human biology at Harvard University or they'd
be up to speed on the hard-wired, biological imperative to reproduce.
They'd also be up to speed on the fun fact that said reproduction
requires - you might want to send the kiddies out of the room
- a male and a female getting horizontal and squishy...together.
no longer teach anthropology at Harvard University or these Korrectnik
nitwits would understand that, statistically speaking, heterosexuality
is the standard sexual relationship practiced by at least 90%
of the alleged humans on this planet.
Smith gets a "pass" on her panty-twisting prose for
two reasons. First and foremost, she's Melanin-Enriched (black,
A.K.A. African-Amerikan). Equally important, it seems safe to
assume that Jada won't be the keynote speaker at the next vast
right-wing conspiracy planning session, because - presumably -
she's a liberal in good standing.
factoid here isn't Jada's remarks, nor is it the fetid fact that
the Whiners went postal over them. The real shocker here is that
so many allegedly intelligent individuals at one of Amerika's premier
universities took the Whiner asshats' "heteronormative"
bovine excrement seriously. If some plain vanilla "how to make
and keep a happy marriage" prattle destroys 'life' as they
know it for these Ivory Tower GLAAD BAAGs, these differently-sexual
cretins are egregiously unprepared for the unflinching reality that
lurks off campus in the dreaded "real" world. They're
headed for the mother of all reality checks and I'd give any-damn-thing
to be there when life bitch slaps them.
"Lady" In Tennessee
Source: Sidelines (Middle Tennessee State University student
State University Korrectniks held a "teach-in" this week
to address the Ivory Tower's number one with a bullet problem: erasing
the patriarchal slur "Lady" from the given name for the
Ivory Tower's female sports teams. For those who care, this Ivory
Tower fishwrap spews the following Korrectnik prose about this stop-the-presses
held a teach-in Wednesday afternoon concerning the social and
political dimensions of using the word "lady" in athletics...'
(Sidelines, emphasis added)
we use the word 'lady,' today at least, we recognize it as sort
of a sexist remark. It is used to sort of suggest secondary status.
There are certainly formal occasions in which one would like to
be treated as Mr. or Mrs. Significant, and we say Ladies and Gentlemen
... that's sort of a norm at restaurants and awards ceremonies,
but just about everywhere else ... it just isn't really appropriate."
(Ryan Husak, a member of Solidarity as quoted by Sidelines)
the obvious conclusion that Ryan Husak is a congenital moron, this
pagan moves on to the most telling fact about this Korrectnik confab.
Although the organizers tried to lure, cajole and/or intimidate
female athletes into attending this whine-a-thon, not a single player
from the "Lady Raiders" showed up. PIG News salutes the
Lady Raiders for their superior judgment when faced with Korrectnik
One Ivory Tower egghead, sociology professor Jackie Eller, opines
that eradicating "lady" is just the first step on long,
torturous road to true "equality" in this patriarchal
we change, as many universities have done, to equity in names
such as Raider women and Raider men, will equity occur? Well,
I don't think so. Not without more hard work throughout society
that continues to point out the evils of inequality and make necessary
I don't know
what Ms. Eller is smoking, but whatever it is, she needs to share
this superb, mind-altering stuff with those forced to sit through
her relentless, mind-numbing blithering.
In Campus Korrectness
Source: Pagan Scribbler News Wire
Those dastardly College Republicans are at it again at a cheesehead
Ivory Tower, Marquette University, with another, panty-twisting,
fund raising escapade. At first glance, the plot to raise money
for Amerikan servicemen serving in Iraq appears harmless enough.
As usual, that pesky devil lurks in those delicious details. Things
got thrilling in a heartbeat when the this collegiate pachyderm
cabal served up 'the rest of the story':
Republicans set up a table to raise money for] a group called
Adopt a Sniper, which says on its Web site it supports snipers
deployed by the United States armed forces in Iraq and Afghanistan.
The group says it "helps real snipers get the real gear they
need to help keep us safe."...' (Reuters)
If any College
Republicans from this cheesehead Ivory Tower lurks in the PIG news
audience, put us down for three of your "1 Shot 1 Kill No Remorse
I Decide" bracelets. Tell us how to close the sale and we're
If you want more information on Adopt a Sniper, surf the information
superhighway to www.adoptasniper.org.
Although we support their goal to raise money for our troops, PIG
is not affiliated with Adopt A Sniper...at this time.
Source: Tongue Tied
The Ivory Tower pinheads who infest Harvard University just pioneered
a stunning new 'reason' why the oppressed can't catch a break. It's
called the "stereotype threat" and it's something special:
arises when "members of a stereotyped group risk doing something
that conforms to the dominant culture's typecasting. If their
performance coincides even slightly with a demeaning belief, they
may be reduced to that stereotype, either in the minds of others
or in their own minds."...' (Tongue Tied)
Stereotype threat! The eggheads who pen Harvard's Mental Health
Letter need to cut back on the adult beverage and stop puffing on
those funny smokes. And how, you ask, would this shiney new excuse
work? Wonder no more. If you're dumb as a box of rocks and just
happen to be Polish, it's not your fault when life doesn't go swimmingly.
Nope, it's that nasty old "stereotype threat". If you're
a chronic boozer who can't go five minutes without an adult beverage
infusion and you just happen to be Irish, your alcohol dependancy
isn't your fault. Nope, it's that nasty old "stereotype threat"
that oppressed you into being a drunken bum.
Fear not, stereotype
threat victims, Harvard's pinheads are there for you. Instead of
taking responsibility for your own actions, your own achievements
and your own shortcomings. Best of all, you're now empowered to
blame society for your problems, and, browbeat the oppressors into
paying for your 'counseling by a trained mental health professional'.
Lone Star state (Mexas) inmates of a Mexas Ivory Tower, University
of North Texas, thrilled the socks off campus Korrectniks when the
Young Republicans perpetrated an attention grabbing jaw-dropper
called "Capture an Illegal Immigrant Day". It's not what
you think, but it's a hoot, none the less:
stunt, the Young Conservatives wore bright orange shirts that
read "Illegal Immigrant" on the front and "Catch
me if U can" on the back. Passers-by were encouraged to track
them down around campus and win a prize...' (Tongue Tied)
You don't need
Nostradamus, prophetic Tome blithering, a crystal ball, tarot cards
or tea leaves to predict that the usual Korrectnik suspects got
their panties in a mega wad over these right-wingnut campus hijinks.
LULAC's (League of United Latin American Citizens) spokeswench,
Pricila Cardenas, decried this exercise in free speech as "offensive"
and "hurtful", among other things, then declared that
conservatives shouldn't be allowed access to the campus's free speech
zone. This wench needs a reality check, stat: From Maine to Mexifornia...from
Mexas to Minnesota, Amerika...every square inch of the USA is a
free speech zone, darlin. If there's anything amiss here that merits
your undivided attention, it's the fetid fact that this Ivory Tower
set aside a special place on campus where free speech "is allowed"
to take place.
Source: World Net Daily
inmates at an Oklahoma Ivory Tower, University of Central Oklahoma,
thrilled campus Korrectniks spitless when the College Republicans
cabal announced its forthcoming "Straight Pride Week".
Everywhere the campus Korrectniks roam they see fliers publicizing
the festivities: "We're here, we're conservative, we're out."
A campus GLAAD BAAG (see PIG Glossary for a translation) group,
Gay Alliance for Tolerance and Equality (GATE), responded - in the
spirit of tolerance and equality, no doubt - by deeming the pachyderms'
stunt "an assault on homosexual students".
does "Straight Pride Week" oppress the differently-sexual?
It doesn't, unless these GLAAD BAAG whiners want to confess that
their ubiquitous Gay Pride day/week/month antics oppress the cringing
heterosexual horde. GATE's hypersensitive whiners need to get over
themselves, stat, because, they created this 'wear your sexuality
on your sleeve' hell with their noisy, public, Gay Pride prance-a-thons.
All things considered - in the spirit of tolerance and equality
- it's beyond fair that these GLAAD BAAG whiners burn in this hell
Source: Oregon Daily Emerald (University of Oregon)
NO-NAD diatribe against patriarchal oppression, "The Vagina
Monologues", is getting assailed by certain properly-hyphenated
suspects because it's too white, too straight and too skinny. Although
it's steeped in victimism, "The Vagina Monologues" is
under assault from the properly-hyphenated horde because it isn't
diverse enough to suit certain perpetually-offended whiners at this
rain-soaked, Oregon Ivory Tower. According to University graduate
Nicole Barrett, NO-NADs of "a variety of skin colors, body
sizes, abilities and gender expressions" are egregiously underrepresented.
I'm shocked, shocked I tell you and so is this shrill Harpy who
issued a public statement bitch-slapping the play's purveyors.
Emerald offered the following snippets of Barrett blithering:
just like to call attention to the fact that this could have been
a more diverse cast, but a safe and welcoming environment was
not created for people that I consider to be 'underrepresented,'..."
that what you are seeing tonight is not the result of an inclusive
process. Know that this space was not one where honest questions
and concerns about race were tolerated."
Vagina Monologues is a very good cause but not all women were
represented in this production of the monologue."
McClatchey, the shows director, offered to establish 'a dialog'
with the play's properly-hyphenated critics, but that probably won't
satisfy a shrieker like Barrett. Is a happy, NO NAD ending out of
the question? Not necessarily. This lowly patriarchal oppressor
has a modest suggestion to resolve this contentious issue: Why don't
these whining bitches settle this the old fashioned way, in a campus-wide,
claw each others eyes out, winner gets to cast the play, pay-per-view?
I guarantee it will make a lot more money than this pathetic, NO-NAD
play. Why must I always do the heavy, intellectual, lifting for
these chronically-oppressed whiners? I give, and give and give...[Sigh]
Source: Denver Post
reached a new 'low' when a Fort Lewis College (Colorado) egghead,
Maria Spero, kicked a student because he wore an Elephant Clan shirt.
While grabbing a nosh at an off-campus eatery, the part time college
instructor took one look at Mark O'Donnell's shirt - it read "Work
for us now...or work for us later" - and kicked him in the
slats. What happened to that Ivory Tower egghead mantra about "a
free exchange of ideas"?
In her defense,
Ms. Spero did express her regrets...at the time:
kicking Mark, Ms. Spero opined that:] "she should have kicked
me harder and higher," O'Donnell said...' (Post)
wench for Ivory Tower tolerance got apologetic, for real, after
her victim reported her to the Ivory Tower and made noises about
pressing charges. Among other things, she noted "...I did not
know you and that you are a Fort Lewis student" (Post).
Is this wench saying that it's cool to physically assault a political
foe as long as he, she, or it isn't a student at her Ivory Tower?
Bold new concept.
lesson here is that emotionally-induced violence is this egghead's
first response, when someone serves up opinions that conflict with
her own political delusions. Her reaction tells you all you need
to know about the Ivory Tower egghead mindset. Ivory Tower eggheads
love free speech, as long as you tell them what they want to hear.
Stray from approved Ivory Tower orthodoxy an you'll see what they
really mean by 'a free exchange of ideas': if you exchange the wrong
ideas, they'll assault you.
been too hard on Maria 'Kick Him in The Slats' Spero...After all,
she's just doing what comes naturally.
Dorm to Homeless In One Easy Lesson
Source: Boston Globe
When his "where
the hell is the damn elevator" impatience reached critical
mass, a dorm-dwelling, University of New Hampshire dude got proactive.
Like most "it seemed like a nifty notion at the time"
inspirations, Tim Garneau's scheme had unanticipated results: UNH
officials banished him from the Ivory Tower's dorms.
In theory, his
plan to speed up elevator response by reducing elevator traffic
isn't fatally flawed. In theory, but reality is a terminally
uncooperative bitch. He, obviously, didn't know that Korrectnicks
have no sense of humor, or he wouldn't have done...it:
posted fliers Sept. 3 that showed a fit woman in a workout leotard
and said: "Nine out of 10 freshman girls gain 10 to 15 pounds.
But there is something you can do about it. If you live below
the sixth floor, take the stairs. Not only will you feel better
about yourself, but you will also be saving us time and won't
be sore on the eyes."...' (Globe)
eggheads threw the book at Tim, charging him with 'lying to school
officials, violating an affirmative action policy, harassment and
disorderly conduct' (Globe). That easily, Tim lost his room
and wound up living in his ride. Unwilling to accept his cruel fate,
Tim got FIRE [Foundation for Individual Rights in Education] involved,
and, it appears to have UNH officials worried. Now, they're willing
to overlook everything but "lying to school officials".
Also, they're cool with putting him on probation, and promise to
give him the next dorm room, when one is available. Unwilling to
accept those terms, Tim continues to hang tough.
If and/or when
this is resolved, PIG will bring you all the thrilling details.
For Tim's sake, let's hope it gets settled before Winter makes living
in his ride hazardous to his health. When we know...you'll know,
so, stay tuned.
Faced with a public relations nightmare and relentless pressure
from FIRE, the University of New Hampshire surrendered and, miraculously,
found room in the dorm for Tim Garneau. Proving how groundless their
initial antics were, school officials dropped requirements for a
mea culpa essay and diversity indoctrination classes.
The good guys
defeat another Ivory Tower! Kudos to FIRE for another stellar victory.
Kudos to Tim Garneau for hanging tough.