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PIG
NEWS ARCHIVE
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A
Compelling Harassment Epic
Source: AP When a Lee County (Florida) bureaucrat got caught playing horizontal bingo with her boss, Lee County Appraiser Ken Wilkenson in Spring 2002, she quit her job then sued, claiming he dumped her when the News Nazis started reporting their trysts. Pissed - and then some - she played sexual harassment roulette, claiming that he manipulated her into boinking him, then forced her into resigning when the bovine excrement hit the fan. Settling out of court, the horndog shelled out $35,000 in 'go away' money...$10,000 for her, the rest for her shyster. In addition, he got her a new government job, under a new boss. Fast forward to the present...The woman and her boss are back in the fishwraps:
Tragically - shoddy journalism rears its ugly head - we're left with an inevitable question. Is our heroine, Julie, horizontally gifted in the extreme, or simply the only female who ever found this loser - Wilkerson - a suitable sexual playmate? Enquiring minds want to know. Afterthoughts Terrors
Of Drive Thru Technology Fast food junkies getting their fix at a Troy, Michigan Burger King are hearing more than 'order please' coming from the drive thru squawk box. Thanks to some clever teenagers, the drive thru speaker is no longer under Burger King's control, not after these teenage pranksters tapped into Burger King's wireless frequency.
This is funny stuff, but Burger King isn't laughing over this terrors of technology outbreak in their own backyard. Were these pranksters inspired? You better believe it, do you want fries with that Sparky. Burger
King Squawk Box Update Burger King officials aren't the only ones who want to catch the drive-up squawk box pranksters. The FCC dispatched a signal detection truck to help nab the pesky lads, but it might all be in vain, since the pranksters are smart enough to stay off the air, until their hunters get bored and give up. Stay tuned for more thrilling updates on this terrors of technology epic. It's
Never Too Late To Say 'I'm Sorry'? A Lone Star State cross cult cabal - The Tarrant Baptist Association - voted, unanimously, to apologize for slavery, a no shit 'better late than never' endeavor. Their resolution prods Mexas (Texas) state Educrats to impose a history of slavery requirement on Mexas cess-school inmates. Big fun. You can bet the proverbial farm that this course bull's-eyes Amerika, exclusively, and whitewashes Sand Rat slavery - it lasted longer and enslaved more individuals - plus it won't say a word about Africans enslaving other Africans...right damn now...today! Korrect to the max? Oh hell yes. Afterthought
Show
Me State Toll Booth Adventure When a Missouri cross cult cabal - The Life Christian Center - got a personal appearance from a dude claiming to be the cross dude himself, the toll booth's padre told the agitated 'savior' to hit the road because he hadn't scheduled his Sunday morning visit ahead of time. Unwilling - unable? - to smite these unfriendly holy rollers for this chilly reception, the visitor got their undivided attention...big damn time...when he drove his car through the toll booth's front doors. Local authorities offered this persistent visitor their special cross dude suite in the gray bar hotel, so it's safe to assume the toll booth isn't 'turning the other cheek', this time. I'm guessing a heartfelt 'amen' from this Missouri congregation is also out of the question. I can live with that. Emerilizing the
Gay Marriage Debate Source: AP The Massachusetts high court Emerilized their recent gay marriage ruling today, waking up the family values Nazis with a resounding 'bam'. Annoyed - to put it mildly - by the state's legicratic dithering, the justices amplified their initial ruling - big damn time - launching the family values storm troopers, from sea-to-shining-sea, into orbit, in the process. '...[the high court] ruled Wednesday that only full, equal marriage rights for gay couples - rather than civil unions - would be constitutional, erasing any doubts that the nation's first same-sex marriages would take place in the state beginning in mid-May...' (AP) Hold onto your hats, loyal readers. The fun is just getting started. Tax Revolt Last August, faced with a whopping deficit and incapable of making the necessary cuts, Oregon legicrats nailed state taxpayers with an eye-popping $800 million dollar tax increase. It's safe to report that this scheme didn't thrill Oregon citizens spitless. Manning the tax revolt barricades, outraged citizens put an tax repealing initiative on the ballot so fast it made hack heads spin. The votes just got tabulated and the results aren't going to make the legicrats' day: '...With 95 percent of precincts reporting early Wednesday, the measure was failing 59 percent to 41 percent. Rejection of the tax package automatically triggers $544 million in spending cuts on May 1...' (CNN) Kudos to Oregon citizens for slapping down their free-spending hacks. In a perfect world, other taxed into poverty Amerikans would emulate your sterling example. If only...but I'm not convinced that the rest of this nation has your gumption. Super Bowl Victory Riots Honoring a recent tradition, football crazed Northeastern University punks staged a victory riot last Sunday, an event that sent local hacks on a frantic search for someone to blame. Before the dust settled, Mayor Menino decreed - in record time - that liquor stores were the villains. Big fun, but two pesky facts don't support this finger-pointing hack's contention. '...several of the stores nearest to Northeastern University shut down within a half hour of the game's kickoff Sunday night...' (Globe) In 2002 there was a similar, Super Bowl riot, and back then liquor stores couldn't open on Sunday. Unwilling - unable - to track down the guilty individuals, hacks beat up on business owners, instead. If you look up 'assclown' in your dictionary, you'll find Mayor Menino's mug shot. A Mexas Recall Fiasco Saturday, Kingsville (Mexas) voters rushed to the polls and recalled three city officials, but a catch-22 might delay their 'good riddance' celebration until May. The city's defrocked mayor and his two city commission cohorts admit that they've been 'untimely ripped' from office, but aren't anywhere close to emptying out their desks. For that thrilling Paul Harvey Moment, we need to cite the CBS boob tube affiliate in Corpus Christi: '...[Defrocked Mayor] Castillo says the secretary of state's office has advised him to stay until he's replaced with an election. Critics say an election can't be held until May, and the officials should leave office as soon as a canvass of votes is finished in about a week...' Although a shyster drama seems inevitable, this pagan must remind his readers that we're talking about Mexas, a state that takes the 'right to keep and bear arms' very damn seriously. Armed and dangerous? You better believe it, Second Amendment Sparky. Zero Tolerance In Minneapolis When Minneapolis Mayor R. T. Rybak left his car running at the curb - unattended, the local men in blue noted it, but decided not to risk involuntary leisure status - paganese for getting fired - by issuing him a citation. No shit business as usual in virtually every city, burg or wide spot in the road, this badge packer response is hardly breaking news. That all changed when the new police chief, Bill McManus, heard about the Mayors unticketed infraction. Faster than a badge packer doughnut run, the new Chief takes matters into his own hands and issues his boss a citation. Bold new concept. According to this fishwrap, the Mayor and Chief discussed it, agreed that the Chief did the right thing and let the matter drop. Yeah, right, but I'm betting the Mayor will get his pound of flesh, down the road, when the Chief comes hat in hand, needing some Mayoral largesse. Payback is a bitch, Chief...Live carefully...Live very carefully. Corporate Welfare Fiasco Meyer Packaging narrowly eluded capitalist oblivion, last August, when the feds served up $6 million in dead presidents worth of loan guarantees to keep the firm operating. The 70 Meyer employees applauded this taxpayer funded fiscal lifeline, but they're probably wondering what the hell happened, now that the plant closed anyway. That's right, corporate welfare fans, Meyer closed it's doors, leaving the U.S. Department of Agriculture on the hook for $4.5 million and the Small Business Administration holding $1.5 million in defaulted loans. When the dust finally settled, and federal officials finished cleaning loan default egg from their faces, the firm's real problems slither out into the open. Meyer Packaging closed, 'because many of their corporate customers moved jobs overseas and packaging went with them'. That sounds right to this pagan, but it's doubtful - in the extreme - that company bean counters didn't know this when they accepted the guaranteed loans. It's always thrilling to watch the feds squander 'our' money so eagerly, with such mind-numbing stupidity. We are profoundly unamused. MARCH
2004
Navy Declares War On John Q. Public
Source: Boston Globe [3/27] From our no good deed goes unpunished desk, we have this cautionary tale about a man, a wrecked plane and heavy-handed federal bureaucrats. Our saga begins in 1990, when a citizen fished a WWII era Navy Corsair from the North Carolina swamp where it languished, unlamented, unwanted since 1944. Taking the wreckage to his Minnesota domicile, he registered it as a 'non airworthy' aircraft with the FAA, then began the slow, painful process of putting the venerable aircraft back together. Ten plus years later, he's still at it, but far from finished. The way things now stand, he might never get the chance to finish his labor of love. You see, the Navy, belatedly, decided it wants the damn thing back. '...Last
week, the U.S. Justice Department, acting
as an agent for the Navy, filed a lawsuit
in Minneapolis seeking the plane, the
cost of returning it and compensation
for ''any damage to or alteration of''
the aircraft since Cralley dug it out
of the swamp...' (Boston Globe)
U.S. Attorney General, John Assclown and his Justice Department goons want the plane back and they want it right damn now, but they're not willing to tell this citizen why. Since John Q. Public has no chance in hell of beating Assclown and his law degree packing Gestapo, I strongly suggest that the citizen put the plane on a truck, drive back to the swamp where he found it and dump it back into the muck were the god damn feds can do their own dirty work. Doesn't the Navy and the so-called Justice Department have better things to do than hammer a citizen? If this plane is so damn important, why did you ignore it for nearly four decades? If this plane is so vital to national security, why didn't you federal asshats pull the damn thing from the swamp when the Navy 'stripped the downed aircraft of its weapons and other equipment before leaving it' (Globe) in 1944? You had your shot at this thing and blew it so butt the hell out. Don't make me come over there, John. Devilish Details Source: USA Today [3/23] This fishwrap's hit piece on media giant, Clear Channel, uses corporate and executive political donations to indict the firm for blatant, pro-elephant clan bias. Alarmed scribblers, breathlessly, report the following 'facts': '...[Clear
Channel executives] have given $42,200
to Bush, vs. $1,750 to likely Democratic
nominee John Kerry in the 2004 race.
'...executives
and Clear Channel's political action committee
gave 77% of their $334,501 in federal
contributions to Republicans. That's a
bigger share than any other entertainment
company, says the non-partisan Center
for Responsive Politics. In contrast,
Viacom (VIA) [CBS, Infinity, etc] executives
and its political action committee gave
just 30% of their $545,650 to Republican
candidates...' (USA Today)
You don't need to be Einstein to smell the rancid spin when this fishwrap's scribblers present Viacom's data: "30% of their $545,600". This spin doctored prose attempts to distract the casual reader from the fun fact that 70% of Viacom's political contributions went to the donkey clan. This fishwrap's spin also glosses over the fact that Viacom's contribution was larger - Viacom gave $545,650, compared to Clear Channel's paltry $334,501. Why didn't USA Today report that the donkey clan raked in $381,955 [70% of $545,600] from Viacom, while the elephant clan only got $257,565 [77% of $334,501] from Clear Channel? I'm sure it slipped their minds. This spin doctored fishwrap spew demonstrates that the devil is always in the details, but you gotta dig through the bovine excrement to find them. Humor Challenged in West Virginia Source: Daily Press (Hampton Roads, Virginia) [3/22] West Virginia Governor Bob Wise is as mad as hell at Abercrombie & Fitch and he's not going to tolerate their West Virginia bashing antics a moment longer. His political hack panties are in a bunch over an A&F T-shirt that reads: "It's All Relative In West Virginia". Outraged, this hack shot off an letter, demanding an apology: "...I
write to you today to demand that you
immediately remove this item from your
stores and your print and online catalogues.
In addition, these shirts must be destroyed
at once to avoid any possibility of resale
and proof be given thereof."
'...Wise
called the T-shirt an "offensive item"
that "subjects our youth to unsubstantiated
and false impressions of West Virginia."
"Indeed, such a depiction of West Virginians
undermines our collective efforts to communicate
a positive representation of the spirit
and values of our citizens," the governor
wrote...' (Daily Press).
Although a shade less colorful than 'bite me', Abercrombie and Fitch's response reveals that A&F isn't ready to dump this popular item. The firm's attitude is clear: If a humor-challenged dolt like Bob Wise doesn't like the T-shirt, he shouldn't buy one. No doubt, A&F executives must wonder how a dude with no sense of humor got elected governor, a burning question that occurred to this pagan, too. Are West Virginians ignorant, inbred hillbillies? Let's examine the relevant facts: They selected blithering Bobby Byrd to be their Senator and Bob 'far from' Wise as their governor, so, the "ignorant, inbred hillbillies" notion is still in play. I'll let somebody else explain this to West Virginia's brain-dead Bobs. Stem Cell Stupidity Source: Reuters [3/17] More true believer chickens came home to roost, thanks to W's supernaturalist-inspired stem cell research ban. When the Pentagon needed stem cell based research to address illnesses caused by battlefield toxins, the Amerikan military took it's $240,000 to Sweden. The resulting research grant specifies Parkinson's disease research since its pathology closely resembles effects caused by battlefield toxins. Amerikan Parkinson sufferers must be thrilled spitless that W places his supernaturalism ahead of this badly needed research for a Parkinson's cure. Kentucky Politics Source: AP [3/17] A Kentucky hack - Knott County Judge-Executive Donnie Newsom - got nailed for buying votes but his two year slammer sojourn won't stop him from performing his county administrator duties. A state law keeps this convicted felon on the job - and on the county payroll - during the appeals process. Since his shyster antics will last much longer than his jail term, his jailbird status poses a minor inconvenience, at most. This tempest in a hill-billy teapot ignores the fun fact that buying votes is as old as electoral politics. Being a rustic hack, Donnie, apparently, didn't keep up with cutting edge hack fun and games. He might be shocked to learn that here in Mexifornia, all hacks buy votes and they never play graybar bingo. That's because they never pay voters directly, like Donnie did. Instead, they launder their donations through a federal, state or local welfare department. Hopefully, Donnie will use his time in jail wisely, by reading up on all these new hack schemes. It's the least he can do for his bought and paid for constituents. . A New Big Apple Game Source: Front Page Magazine [03/01] Certain pathetic, Big Apple asshats created a sick - in the extreme - new game called "Chink Bashing". It involves, among other things, luring a lotus clan victim into hostile territory then assaulting him or her, a practice that cost an Chinese dude named Huang Chen his life, last month. As sick as this is, it gets worse, because, the proper authorities aren’t running a hate crime charge up the justice system flagpole. Why? I’m guessing that this alleged game is a melanin-enriched gig, and that grants these asshats irrevokable immunity when it comes to hate crimes. What proof do I have for this melanin-enriched perp theory? One of Mr. Chen’s murderers is named "Naquan", and that’s a no shit melanin-enriched name. Hate criminals only come in one color and that color is white. Afterthoughts: Front Page Scribbler, Andrew Popper nailed it when he ended his article with this pointed prose: '...It
is interesting to note that when a black
youth is killed in any racially tinged
incident, the regular media invariably
refer to the victim as a "boy," usually
accompanied by a sympathetic graduation
picture. In this case, however, where
the victim is an Asian boy killed in what
is undeniably a hate crime, the media
chose to call him a man; no pictures accompanied
any of the NY City newspaper articles.
Apparently some victims of racist murder
warrant more sympathy from the media than
others. It is time that all victims of
such vile hate crimes receive equal attention
and that the evil hypocrisy of selective
indignation is ended...' (Front Page)
APRIL 2004
A Golden D'Oh Candidate Source: Nebraska Boob Tube [4/29] It's not breaking news when a state bureaucrat 'misplaces' the public funds entrusted to his care, unless...He was serving time for theft when he got hired for the job. Trust me when I tell you that hiring someone whose job application has a return address like "cell block 17" is not an idea whose time has come. Our hero - Rock Mueller - overcame his prison stripes to land a cushy, $55,000 per year, job coordinating Nebraska's million dollar tobacco cessation program. Given his background, why was anyone shocked when some funds went AWOL? '...[State auditor Kate Witek]
turned up evidence that Mueller was
paid by a contract firm that he picked
to create the Nebraska Tobacco Quit
Line. Pioneer, a company out of Salt
Lake City, was not the lowest bidder
for the project, Witek said, but Mueller
chose them to do the work, then received
about $78,000 from the firm for expenses
and marketing fees. Witek's report
shows that Mueller "either made the
handwritten alterations to the vendor
bid scores or was aware of the alterations"
to make sure Pioneer got the contract...'
(Omaha Channel)
Those who obsess over fun facts will enjoy hearing that the clown who hired ethically-challenged Mueller got promoted to state treasurer. Knowing that this moron controls the state bankbook must thrill cornhusker taxpayers spitless. Exporting Biotech Jobs Source: San Francisco Chronicle [4/18] The usual suspects who promote biotech as the next big Amerikan thing that will drive our economy to greater capitalist glory might want to shut their yaps long enough to read a long, eye-opening story in the April 18 issue of this Gulag fishwrap. Contrary to administration propaganda, biotech might not be poised to provide all those nifty, new high-paying, stateside jobs. That might have been true, two years ago, but onerous government regulations - ruinous tax policies and other hack-perpetrated trauma - are driving many Gulag area biotech firms to seek outsourcing partners in Asia. If you give a flaming damn about our economy and it's future, take the time to read this piece in the Chronicle. The 9 Commandments? '...Buonanno, 47, said he
is a Christian and loves all people
regardless of their lifestyle.
"But I cannot value homosexuality and
any different religious beliefs.'..."
(News Max)
Albert's refusal to sign this diversity bovine excrement got his supernaturalist butt fired - a predictable result, under the circumstances - sending his advenuture careening into Shysterland. Outraged, Albert went shyster bonkers, spewing civil rights drivel about AT&T's blatant religious discrimination. Proving that there are still a few functional synapses strewn across our judicial wasteland, a federal judge gave this Holy Roller whiner back wages and his 401K (his take totaled $150,000), but refused his plea for punitive damages. Diversity bonkers AT&T dodged a wallet emptying bullet, but they still got shafted by this property rights-trampling decision. It's not the government's task to set a private firm's employment policy. If AT&T's diversity policy sucks, let the marketplace - not the government - punish them. If Albert doesn't like AT&T's employment terms, he can get a new job, elsewhere. Afterthought What, exactly, is involved when a rational adult 'values' someone else's beliefs? Enquiring minds want to know. OPEC Bonkers In Congress Source: Reuters [4/1] According to this news blurb, at least one Elephant Clan Legicrat, Senator Mike DeWine (Ohio), is mad as hell over OPEC's production cutback and he's not going to take it anymore. In his fevered brain, OPEC needs to be hammered with Amerika's antitrust laws, a thrilling notion that, conveniently, ignores the salient facts, as set out by prior court rulings: '...federal courts have held
that OPEC is immune from prosecution
under the antitrust laws because it's
price-setting is "governmental" rather
than "commercial."...' (Reuters)
MAY 2004
Hell No She Won't Go
Source: Sacramento Bee [5/31] Determined to keep tabs on her city's men in blue, Darby (Pennsylvania) mayor, Paula Brown, set up her mayoral office in police headquarters. Believe it or not, this arrangement didn't thrill everyone concerned. In fact, the cops asked the mayor wench to leave, but she has other ideas about it. '...A Pennsylvania mayor was holed up in her office at the police station and vowed to stay there until Tuesday to prevent a locksmith hired by the Borough Council from locking her out...' (Bee) Mayor Brown claims that her actions are motivated by the 3 court orders that specify police oversight as her top priority. Her critics claim that her antics are publicity-grabbing grandstanding. The truth, probably, is somewhere in-between these polarized views, however, there's a faint stench here betraying an ambitious hackette who wants to move up the political food-chain at police expense. Afterthought Playing Atkins Diet Bingo The good news is that Florida denizen Jody Gorran - probably - lost weight when he played Atkins Diet roulette. The bad news is that his cholesterol levels reached orbital velocity, clogging a major artery...big damn time. Since his "diet" included a daily cheese festival, and cheesecake 3-times a week, this result isn't breaking news. As expected, our hero decided to put the blame elsewhere, so he's suing Atkins' estate for leading him astray. You didn't expect him to take personal responsibility did you? Aiding and abetting his quest for diet dollar enrichment is a vegan group called "Physicians Committee for Responsible Medicine". And now, you know the rest of the story. Bonkers In Beantown Teddyville set aside a designated area for anyone visiting Beantown to protest against the Donkey Clan convention in late July. According to this Globe prattle, the area selected might elicit more protests than the Donkey Clan convention.
Ms. Rose's pointed prose describes most of Beantown, thanks to that ultimate boondoggle, "The Big Dig". Lest you accuse me of hyperbole, be advised that this pagan just returned from a trip to Boston. So there! Afterthought: A Mexas Pervert Epic A minor league Lone Star State pervert returned to a certain Houston neighborhood once too often, so the local residents decided to persuade him to leave, permanently. It all started with some kids spotted this scumbag. Tired of this pervert's antics, 20 youngsters armed themselves with sticks and took out after the dude. From there, things got way fun, in a heartbeat:
They cornered the pervert, but decided not to beat the snot out of him...this time. They let the cops take him away, but made it clear that the pervert wouldn't be treated so gently, if he visited them again. The only way some people 'get it' involves a long overdue ass-kicking. So be it. Amerika's Newest Disability The Shyster Full Employment act - A.K.A. the American's With Disabilities Act - recently unleashed a new disability and this one is a veritable gem. Officially dubbed 'paruresis', this affliction is more commonly known as 'shy bladder syndrome'. Shy bladder is an alleged brain-fart that imposes bladder lock if you attempt to take a whiz away from your humble abode. When Caterpillar, Inc asked Tom Smith for a whiz sample needed to run a drug test, Tom - allegedly - went into bladder lock, preventing him from serving up the required whiz sample in the allotted 3 hour time span. The company said - in essence - no whiz, no job, prompting Caterpillar to fire Tom soon after his adventure in whizius interruptus. Unwilling to accept his fate - before you can say "vapor lock" - Tom is playing ADA roulette.
Smith also paid for a hair-based drug test, but the company still won't take him back. It's the way a company gets when you dump them into ADA hell. Tom, dude, wake up and smell the coffee. Their company...their rules...game over. Move on, dude...find a new job. I mean, really....shy bladder syndrome? I'm a dude, too, and I'm here to tell you that when nature calls, you gotta go, right damn now, no matter where you are. Emerilizing Hack Antics In New Mexico New Mexico's governor, Bill Richardson, has a nifty way to seize control over government functions that are no shit not his job. Bill's appointees to university boards of regents must sign and deliver - to Governor Bill - an undated letter of resignation, before he nominates them. Then, after they're anointed by the state's Legicrats, he can simply 'accept' their pre-delivered resignation, any time the regent fails to obey each and every Gubernatorial Educrap brain-fart. It's a nifty - in the extreme - scheme that only has one pesky flaw: it violates the state's constitution.
Governor Bill is a Bubba pal - a political appointee, during Bubba's oval office tenure- so don't lose any sleep waiting for him to give a rip about legal restraints. New Mexico elected him and they're no shit stuck with him, unless they stage a Mexifornia-style Gubernatorial ousting. So be it. Big Apple Bureaucratic Brain-Fart A Big Apple bureaucratic bright bulb put a parking meter thisclose to a fire hydrant, making it impossible for anything larger than a skate board to park there without straying too close - within 15 feet - to a fire hydrant. This tempting 'gotcha' in parking-challenged Gotham pulls in a nifty $115 per victim, a thrilling fact that explains why the parking Nazis visit it so often. Nobody in Big Apple city government gave a damn about this enriching parking meter scam, until, the Daily News ratted them out. In a heartbeat, the meter is gone and a 'No Standing' sign takes its place. Kudos to this Big Apple fishwrap are in order and eagerly conferred. You done damn good, dudes. It Looked Good, On Paper In 2002 Seattle denizen Bobby Inshetski fulfilled a dream when he helped pass a city initiative to finance a 14-mile monorail system with taxpayer greenbacks. Bobby celebrated the city's intrusion into the mass transit marketplace by purchasing a condo along the monorail's proposed route. Two years later, 'celebrate' is the farthest thing from Bobby's mind, thanks to those devilish monorail details:
File this under "be careful what you ask for" in your Golden D'oh archives. Bobby learned, the hard way, that reality can be a major bitch. I can live with that, and so can Bobby Inshetski. A Gulag Big Brother Tizzy Gulag-based civil libertarians are in a tizzy because the Gulag's library commission is, tentatively, planning to embed tracking chips in the knowledge emporium's reads. ACLU worry warts fret that it gives Big Brother chapter and verse on the Gulag's literate denizens.
Commission President Charles Higueras smells a political firestorm, so he's spouting rhetoric that he'll "proceed cautiously". Furthermore, he's assuring his agitated critics that a yes vote "is not a headlong rush into a blind acceptance of this RFID technology". That's right, hack fans, this bureaucrat is testing the political waters with this RFID vote trial balloon. If you look up decisive leadership in your Webster's you won't find this clown's picture. War Wounds War 'hero' John Kerry continues to get hammered about his 4-month stint in Nam. This week, his war wound strayed into the political spotlight when the Navy Medic who treated Kerry related a much different story about the cause and nature of fearless warrior John's Purple Heart ouchie. Kerry Says: Fierce firefight Doctor Louis Letson's version differs on several fronts:
Bold new concept...Kerry is more than a lying, war protesting asshat. He's a lying, war protesting asshat wimp. He built his entire political career on this? His celebrated wound is a microscopic metal sliver that could be tweezered out and covered up by a band-aid? Stop whining and grow some nads, John. JUNE 2004
Cutting Marital Ties
Leaving nothing to chance, Sharon also cites Kentucky's 1998 same sex marriage ban, insisting that Paul hatched his 'I'm a chick saddled with male nads' notion at age 3. As thrilling as that all is, reality tells a different story. 'Always a chick' Paul managed to woody up for Sharon - at least twice - since they produced two daughters (ages 13 and15) together. Sad story, Sharon, fathering children qualifies as no shit male to this terminally amused pagan scribbler. What else have you got, babe?
Election Year Half-Truths Source: Washington Times [06/26] Donkey clan hacks are shocked and dismayed that W's official campaign Internet site dares to invoke Hitler imagery as part of its presidential campaign fare. What makes this "so's your old lady" crap worth mentioning is the fun fact that the Hitler images in question aren't elephant clan at all. The Hitler references - and images - are lifted from W-bashing ads presented by that donkey clan shock troop cabal - MoveOn.org. - on their web site. Kerry campaign officials managed to skip over that part, when they played outrage bingo for a highly receptive media.
Where was this alleged outrage when your MoveOn cohorts ran these Hitler ads up the flagpole in January? Your silence, at that point, was deafening. You created this MoveOn W is Hitler hell, so it's beyond fair that you burn in it. The Potted Padre Caper
Arizona's two rosary true believer cabals - The Archdiocese of Tucson, the Archdiocese of Phoenix - never heard of this dude, but the men in blue did manage to track down photos of his ordination on the Internet. Given this clown's adult beverage-induced antics, I don't blame Rosary True Believer officials for disavowing our hero.
Punching a cop? Acting combative and spitting on cops and paramedics? What the hell happened to "turning the other cheek", padre dude? Strange Bedfellows I Source: NY Post [06/24] Fueled by W-hating billionaire George Soros' greenbacks, a Donkey Clan group named America Coming Together - A.K.A. ACT- made some unlikely hiring decisions that should - but probably won't - make this election buying zealot take a timeout to rethink this ACT affiliation. Despite their colorful past, the new hires are tasked with going door to door, encouraging citizens to register...and vote Donkey Clan. '...Dozens of names and addresses of ACT employees matched those of people convicted of burglary, forgery, drug dealing, assault and sex offenses. ACT hired some felons who were living in halfway houses, [an AP report revealed]...' (Post)
'...The markers in Deerfield, Mass. mark spots where, in 1704, French and Indian forces attacked settlers. Some contain references to ''savages" and ''Negro servants" that are now considered offensive. nWhere one marble tablet originally read, "Mary, adopted by an Indian, was named Walahowey. She married a savage, and became one,' it now reads, "She married a Kanien'kahake and adopted the culture, customs and language of her new community in Kahnawake."...' (Tongue Tied) Rewriting history is old hat for Korrectnik assclowns. Normally, they do their dirty deeds on the sly, where John and Jane Q. Public can't see them. It's disturbing - in the extreme - that Korrectniks now feel confident enough to pull these stunts in broad daylight, while everyone is watching. |