A Flori-DUH Morality Nazi Does What Comes Naturally
Source: Golden Oinks [03/12/10]

When it comes to using taxes and regulation to achieve his personal vision of a socially-engineered Eden, a Flori-DUH state Legicrat, Stephen Precourt, is leading the march into this Brave New World.

A Florida state senator is pushing for new legislation that would increase tax breaks for the movie industry but deny the same incentives to films featuring gay characters.

Current Florida law grants tax credits on productions considered "family friendly" -- films that omit smoking, sex, nudity or profane language. But in a bid to attract more movie production to Florida, Republican Rep. Stephen Precourt of Orlando is pushing a bill that would increase the credit and expand the field of disqualified productions as those that include any "exhibit or implied act" of nontraditional family values and gratuitous violence, the Palm Beach Post reported Tuesday. Precourt said he's not targeting the gay community but that shows with gay characters would not be something he'd want "to invest public dollars in." (Fox News)

Stevie is begging for an up close and personal Hambo encounter. Why? Several reasons. For starters, a tax credit is NOT an "investment of public dollars". In reality, a tax credit means that some Nanny State entity won’t steal you blind. It will still mug you, but it will leave you bus fare. It's THEIR money Stevie, not yours. They EARNED it. All you're doing is quibbling about how much of it you plan to STEAL.

Stevie’s supernaturalist brain fart is NOT a sound basis for setting public policy. In this land conceived in liberty, the government’s ONLY task is creating an environment where liberty thrives. When it comes to picking winners and losers, that’s the assigned, legitimate, role of the marketplace, not some Elected Tormentor Social Engineer with a personal agenda.

If Stevie is determined to save souls, and promote his personal flavor of morality, he MUST do that from the pulpit, not the state legislature, via the tax code. Shut up and sit down, Stevie. You don’t want me to come over there.

Another Day, Another Islamikaze Hissy Fit
Source: STV News [03/02/10]

The more I watch Islamikaze antics, the more convinced I am that ‘outraged’ is what passes for normal in their so-called lives. As far as I can tell, the only time they aren’t outraged, is when they’re in a coma/vegetative state, and I wouldn’t bet the camel herd on THAT.

This week’s panty-wadding meltdown revolves around a name: "Medina". For rage-a-holic Islamikazes, Medina is the second holiest city in Islam. For geography-minded Americans, it’s the name of cities in the following states: Minnesota, New York, North Dakota, Ohio, Tennessee, Texas, and Washington. For world travelers ‘medina’ is a term used to denote ‘a market or bustling trading center in north African cities’. Last, but far from least, ‘Medina’ is the new name for an adult beverage emporium in Dundee, Scotland: Medina Bar and Grill.

Believe it or not, there are Mecca Maniacs in Dundee and they are not thrilled spitless with the new name for the establishment formerly known as ‘Bar Rio’.

One senior member of Dundee's Central Mosque said the use of the Medina name in a place serving alcohol was "disrespectful". Mohammed Bashir Chohan, chairman of the Dundee Islamic Society, said: "People are upset about it because Medina is a holy city in Islam. It does hurt when somebody misuses the name, especially if they are going to sell liquor."

However, on Tuesday a spokesman for Medina said there was no offence intended in the bar's new name. He said: "The designer of the bar came to us with a number of different names. Medina Bar & Grill was one of them. We asked him what it meant and he said it was the use of medina as a noun, rather than the city in Saudi Arabia.

"The bar has a Moroccan theme and, as far as we were told, medina is the hustle-bustle of an old quarter of a north African city. There was no intended link to the second holiest city of Islam, and there was absolutely no offence intended." (STV News)

I’ll set aside, with considerable difficulty, the burning question: What the f**k are Islamikazes doing in Scotland? Instead, I’ll simply state that, if Medina Bar and Grill is the biggest problem in your life, you must stop your caterwauling and GET ON WITH IT. Your INSANE hypersensitivity does NOT automatically repeal the liberty birthright of sovereign individuals, so STFU. Don’t make me come over there.

Morality Nazis On A Rampage
Source: Hambo’s Hammer [02/25/10]

Tacoma, Washington: A 19 year old barista did her best to make life thrilling for patrons of Puyallup’s Bikini Bottoms espresso stand. How? Tastefully attired in thong bottom and X-shaped pasties, she made that java jolt a visual feast for the relentlessly horny.

Predictably, some whiner got its panties in wad over our hubba hubba hottie and ran caterwauling to the proper authorities. I’m sorry to report that Pierce County injustice officials gave a provisional seal of approval to the right which prevents the egregiously hypersensitive from being offended, by charging the wench with ‘unlawful public exposure'.

‘Get over it’ is on life support, in the Great Northwest Nitwit heartland.

The Apple App Store in Cyberspace: If you’re a techno troll who is the proud owner of a hand-held terror of Apple-perpetrated technology, I might have some troubling news for you. If you like to get a cheap thrill from ogling, and/or electronically manipulating bikini clad hotties with your iPad, iPhone, etc., you’re not going to be a happy camper.

Egged on by chronically offended Morality Nazis, Apple has purged at least 5,000 - ‘overtly sexual’ - apps from their online store. Why? It’s ‘for the children’, of course.

Colorado Springs, Colorado: If you’ve never heard of a Broadway show named "Avenue Q", don’t feel like the lone ranger. All you need to know is that this popular play is wadding Holy Roller panties in Colorado Springs, because of the advertising posters deployed in the city’s bus shelters. What’s the problem? The posters for the touring company feature - GASP - cleavage. I know what you’re thinking, but it’s much more asinine than you think:

Puppet cleavage has been ruled out for advertising posters in Colorado Springs bus shelters. Lamar Advertising rejected posters for a touring production of the Broadway show "Avenue Q" because they show the cleavage of a fuzzy pink puppet.

Lamar account executive Jeff Moore says the company takes a conservative approach in Colorado Springs. The city is known for its political conservatism, and some conservative Christian groups have headquarters in the city.

The poster has been replaced by one showing the face of another puppet.

"Avenue Q" is a Tony-winning musical about twentysomething New Yorkers, both human and puppets, searching for life and love. (Yahoo News)

Puppet cleavage? Have these Holy Rollers lost their f-ing minds?

CPAC Give CAIR Cretin A Boo-Boo
Source: Girlieman of the Week [02/19/10]

A steaming Jihadikaze turd, CAIR (Council on American Islamic Relations) spokesasshole Ibrahim Hooper, is not happy camper, this week. Why? Blissfully unaware of his exercise in self parody, he’s blubbering because CPAC has scheduled a panel discussion on Mecca Mania’s ‘war on free speech’, plus assorted other Jihadikaze-related issues.

A panel discussion on the threat posed by "Islamic supremacism," Shariah and political correctness has been scheduled for this week's Conservative Political Action Conference, stirring complaints from some American Muslims that the exercise amounts to Muslim-bashing.

The two-hour session, titled "Jihad: The Political Third Rail," is set for Friday morning, right in the middle of the three-day annual summit of conservative icons and activists in Washington, D.C.

Scheduled to speak are Steve Coughlin, a former Pentagon specialist on Islamic law who was fired two years ago, allegedly under pressure from pro-Muslim officials, and Wafa Sultan, an author and prominent critic of Islam. The discussion is billed as a window into Islam's "war on free speech," the "encroachment" of Shariah -- or Islamic law -- in the West and efforts by the Muslim Brotherhood to infiltrate American society. (Fox News)

If he/it had a scintilla of manhood, Ibrahim would insist on participating in the discussion of his supernaturalism’s unrelenting war on inalienable liberty. If he/it had a spine, he would exercise his free speech birthright, instead of trying to silence anyone who says things that he doesn’t want to hear. If he/it had a single functioning synapse, he’d spend quality time in the FSOP, where he might finally get up to speed on the fact that there is no right which protects him from being offended. Instead he spouts drivel like this:

"It's unfortunate that a conservative conference would be in any way associated with Muslim bashers and Islamophobes. It's a free country. They're free to be anti-Muslim bigots if they like, but it's really up to the organizers of CPAC to determine if they're going to allow their conference to be associated with the hate-filled views of those who will be speaking."

Congratulations, Ibrahim. You’re more than a caterwauling cretin. You’re the jabbering Jihadikaze shitbag poster punk.

Weasel Words In Washington, D.C.
Source: Washington Times [02/12/10]

Stoned on Mecca Mania, Jihadikazes are determined to exterminate the Great Satan, Western Culture, and inalienable individual liberty, from the face of the Earth. I know it. You know it. Our men and women in uniform know it. All rational adults know it.

There are, however, dangerously deranged asshats in positions of authority who are doing their best to ignore it. For those noxious nuggets, I’ll yield the floor to the Washington Times:

The 108-page Quadrennial Homeland Security Review, made public last week by the Department of Homeland Security, uses the term "terrorist" a total of 66 times, "al Qaeda" five times and "violent extremism" or "extremist" 14 times. It calls on the U.S. government to "actively engage communities across the United States" to "stop the spread of violent extremism."

Yet in describing terrorist threats against the United States and the ideology that motivates terrorists, the review - like its sister document from the Pentagon, the Quadrennial Defense Review - does not use the words "Islam," "Islamic" or "Islamist" a single time.

Although the homeland security official in charge of developing the review insists it was a not a deliberate decision, the document is likely to reignite a debate over terminology in the U.S.-led war against al Qaeda that has been simmering through two administrations.

"There was not an active choice" to avoid using terms derivative of Islam, Homeland Security Assistant Secretary for Policy David Heyman told reporters on a conference call. President Obama had "made it clear as we are looking at counterterrorism that our principal focus is al Qaeda and global violent extremism, and that is the terminology and language that has been articulated" by Mr. Obama and his advisers, Mr. Heyman added. He declined to use the I-word.

How in the hell does Uncle Sam win a war, when the putrid pissants in power can’t, won’t, properly identify the enemy? Osama and his Jihadikazes didn’t get some random wild hair up their ass. They got a wild ISLAMIC hair up their ass. Until Uncle Sam confronts that unambiguous fact, we’ll never exterminate this threat to our lives and liberty.

A Cacophony of Caterwauling in Colorado Springs
Source: Fox News [02/03/10]

Eager to promote supernaturalist diversity, the brass running the United State Air Force Academy, deployed an outdoor worship site for academy’s resident pagans. Essentially a circle of large boulders - a holy rock pile, if you will - its creation annoyed the crap out of certain NIMBY-minded Cross Cultists.

On January 17, 2010, someone of the Cross Cult persuasion, set off a firestorm of pagan pissing and moaning when he, she, heshe, it, or ‘they’ left a calling card at the holy rock pile: a cross constructed out of railroad ties. No harm, no foul? You must be delusional...

Tech. Sgt. Brandon Longcrier, a self-described pagan who sponsors the group that worships there, said the incident was similar to someone leaving a pentagram or a pagan symbol at the academy's chapel altar and claimed he and others are victim of a hate crime. In an e-mail to Weinstein's group, Longcrier said his group had been "thrown under the bus by the system we trusted" and that the "hate crime" has been ignored.

David Cannon, director of communications at the Air Force Academy, said the incident remains under investigation. He declined to indicate whether it could be classified as a hate crime pending completion of the probe.

Cannon said that if a cadet were behind the incident, the Air Force would have the power to prosecute. If a civilian did it, the case could be taken up by local authorities. "Until (the investigation) is over, we can't classify it as anything," Cannon told FoxNews.com, adding that it remains unclear whether cadets were involved.

In a statement issued Wednesday, Lt. Gen. Mike Gould, the Air Force Academy's superintendent, said the school will take "appropriate action" if a cadet were indeed responsible. "Our message is simple: we are taking this incident very seriously and conducting an inquiry," Gould's statement read. "We absolutely do not stand for any type of destructive behavior or disrespect for human dignity." (Fox)

"Thrown under the bus by the system we trusted"? A "hate crime"? "Destructive behavior"? "Disrespect for human dignity"? Have they lost their f-ing minds? Perhaps, but I have some timely observations which might save the day.

Apparently - I'm as shocked as you must be - The Politically Incorrect Gazette isn't required reading at the Air Force Academy. My STFU Top Story has all the answers they need, but, tragically, nobody is paying attention.

If PIG was required reading at this institution, this caterwauling pagan, Tech. Sgt. Brandon Longcrier, the primary pinhead who venerates the 'holy' rock pile, wouldn't be acting like an utter and complete ass. Instead of blubbering that his group had been "thrown under the bus by the system we trusted" and 'victimized' by a "hate crime", he would be busy learning this Properly-PIGish Pagan Ritual: Just close your eyes, stick your fingers in your ears, hum REAL LOUD, and GET OVER IT.

If PIG was required reading at the Air Force Academy, the brass wouldn’t be setting their hair on fire, ordering investigations, and bloviating about "destructive behavior" and "disrespect for human dignity". Instead, in addition to testing the local water supply for mind-altering substances, they would alleviate that painful knot in their knickers with this can’t miss FSOP solution: Just close your eyes, stick your fingers in your ears, hum REAL LOUD, and GET OVER IT.

Holy Crap
Source: PIG News Wire [01/29/10]

A Rosary True Believer priest - he plies his trade in Illinois at St. Andrew's Catholic Church in Christopher and St. Mary's Catholic Church in Sesser - needs to brush up on his Tome, in general, and two passages, in particular:

"It is more blessed to give than to receive."

"Thou shalt not steal."

This soul wrangler may, or may not, have a hint about the first passage, but he hasn’t got a clue on the second:

WEST CITY, Ill. – A Roman Catholic priest was accused of shoplifting butter and a sofa cover at a Wal-Mart in southern Illinois. Police arrested 41-year-old the Rev. Steven Poole on Friday. He's charged with two felony theft counts. Investigators said Poole failed to scan a $3.22 container of butter and a $60 sofa cover at a self-checkout. Poole then allegedly went to the store's bedding section, picked up a memory foam mattress and switched the pricing bar code. That caused the $145 item to be scanned for $31.

Allegedly, Poole also possessed a stolen laptop computer power pack. (Yahoo News)

Stevie’s willingness to help himself to someone else’s worldly goods is a good start on a new career. He’s one pesky tax cheat rap away from an enriching career in the Obama administration.

Supernaturalism-Inspired Whining
Source: Hambo’s Hammer [01/29/10]

The ‘Devil’ Made Him Do It
A Contra Costa County (Mexifornia) dude, Arthur Mijares, is obsessed with ‘The Devil’. No, not THAT devil, but he seems to have unresolved ‘issues’ with HIM, too. In this case, the Devil in question is a 3,849 prominence called Mount Diablo.

After trying, and failing, to change this devilish name, in 2005, Arthur is running his idea to change the mountain’s name up the federal flagpole - United States Board on Geographic Names - again.

In 2005, he attempted to change the name to Mount Reagan, but the board, citing its Commemorative Naming Policy, told him the late president needed to be dead for at least five years before receiving such an honor. The former California governor died June 5, 2004.

Mijares argued that the devil, or "diablo," was a "living person" so that name should also be prohibited. He eventually settled on three alternative options: Mount Yahweh, Mount Miwok or Mount Ohlone. The federal board denied all three options, citing the negative recommendations from the supervisors and other agencies, many with Mount Diablo in their names.

This go-round, Mijares petitioned for Mount Reagan from the start, now that the late Republican is eligible.

"The Commemorative Name (Mount Reagan) speaks for itself," wrote Mijares to the board. He also included a Wikipedia entry for the late president with his application. (Contra Costa Times)

As usual I have several takes on this lunacy.

* Arthur needs to get over it, or, if that’s impossible, he should MOVE.

* Has Arthur considered the fact that, to many of Mexifornia’s indigenous moonbats, Ronald Reagan IS the Devil, making this name change a distinction without a difference?

* If Arthur wants to expunge some REAL devils from Mexifornia, he should head for Sacramento, where the demon’s spawn in the state senate just passed a bill that would eradicate ALL free parking spaces from the no longer ‘Golden’ State.

* Does Arthur have similar issues with - GASP - DEVIL’s FOOD CAKE? Does he want it named after the Gipper, too?

Grow a pair, Arthur.

Similar Brainfart, Different Perspective
A noted supernaturalist, Mother Teresa, will be ‘honored’ by the USPS with a stamp, due out on August 26, 2010. She’s not the first supernaturalist so honored - Father Flanagan, Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King, and Nation of Islam icon Malcolm X already blazed that USPS trail.

No harm, no foul? It is to this pagan scribbler, but those Evangelizing Atheists, The Freedom From Religion Foundation, are having a hair-incinerating boycott spawning hissy fit over it. It’s not their first such hissy fit. They got pissy about Father Flanagan’s stamp, too, but - not wanting rampaging Ethnocrats crawling up their butts - they let the Martin Luther King and Malcolm X stamps slide, deeming the two Melanin-Enriched dudes, ‘civil rights leaders’.

Freedom from Religion Foundation spokeswoman Annie Laurie Gaylor says issuing the stamp runs against Postal Service regulations.

"Mother Teresa is principally known as a religious figure who ran a religious institution. You can't really separate her being a nun and being a Roman Catholic from everything she did," Gaylor told FoxNews.com.

Gaylor said the atheist group opposed Father Flanagan's stamp but not those for King and Malcolm X, because she said they were known for their civil rights activities, not for their religion.

Martin Luther King "just happened to be a minister," and "Malcolm X was not principally known for being a religious figure," she said.

"And he's not called Father Malcolm X like Mother Teresa. I mean, even her name is a Roman Catholic honorific."

Gaylor said Mother Teresa infused Catholicism into her secular honors — including an "anti-abortion rant" during her Nobel Prize acceptance speech — and that even her humanitarian work was controversial.

"There was criticism by the end of her life that she turned what was a tiny charity into an extremely wealthy charity that had the means to provide better care than it did," Gaylor said. "...There's this knee jerk response that everything she did was humanitarian, and I think many people would differ that what she was doing was to promote religion, and what she wanted to do was baptize people before they die, and that doesn't have a secular purpose for a stamp." (Fox)

It’s a STAMP, just a STAMP. If you want to get pissy about something, someone, why not paint a bull’s-eye on Americans most infamous cult leader, a Dumbo-eared Marxist with delusions of messianic grandeur? If you’re not up to that challenge, then do what you’ve gotta do....but do it QUIETLY. Your caterwauling is pissing me off.

Satan Sets Pat Robertson Straight?
Source: PIG News Wire [01/22/10]

If you’ve been paying attention, you’re familiar with Pat Robertson’s headline spawning prose about the real reason Haiti was hit with an earthquake:

[S]omething happened a long time ago in Haiti and people might not want to talk about it. They were under the heel of the French, uh you know Napoleon the third and whatever. And they got together and swore a pact to the Devil. They said we will serve you if you'll get us free from the French. True Story. And so the Devil said "Okay, it's a deal." And they kicked the French out. You know, the Haitians revolted and got themselves free. But ever since they have been cursed by one thing after the other, desperately poor. That island is Hispaniola is one island. It's cut down the middle. On one side is Haiti, on the other side is the Dominican republic. Dominican Republic is prosperous, healthy, full of resorts, etc.. Haiti is in desperate poverty. Same island. Uh, they need to have, and we need to pray for them, a great turning to God and out of this tragedy. I'm optimistic something good may come.

What many of you may not know, is that Satan himself set Pat straight, in this letter to the Minneapolis Star-Tribune.

Dear Pat Robertson,

I know that you know that all press is good press, so I appreciate the shout-out. And you make God look like a big mean bully who kicks people when they are down, so I'm all over that action.

But when you say that Haiti has made a pact with me, it is totally humiliating. I may be evil incarnate, but I'm no welcher. The way you put it, making a deal with me leaves folks desperate and impoverished.

Sure, in the afterlife, but when I strike bargains with people, they first get something here on earth -- glamour, beauty, talent, wealth, fame, glory, a golden fiddle. Those Haitians have nothing, and I mean nothing. And that was before the earthquake. Haven't you seen "Crossroads"? Or "Damn Yankees"?

If I had a thing going with Haiti, there'd be lots of banks, skyscrapers, SUVs, exclusive night clubs, Botox -- that kind of thing. An 80 percent poverty rate is so not my style. Nothing against it -- I'm just saying: Not how I roll.

You're doing great work, Pat, and I don't want to clip your wings -- just, come on, you're making me look bad. And not the good kind of bad. Keep blaming God. That's working. But leave me out of it, please. Or we may need to renegotiate your own contract.

Best, Satan

Why, you ask, is Satan hanging out in a real winter place like Minnesota? Given the conditions ‘down there’, he’s one dude who can fully appreciate the bone-chilling cold of a Globally-Warmed, ice age-class winter.

Color-Coded Morality Nazis
Source: AFP [01/15/10]

I’m trying to be thrilled over the news that India has its own Morality Nazi pestilence to make life thrilling for any stray rational adults in the home of color-coded citizenry. If you need to put them on a sliding scale of Morality Nazi mania, the Indian variety lies between Donald Wildmon and Brent Bozell on the low end and the Sand Box/Taliban asshats on the high, lunatic fringe, end of the scale.

Our color-coded funsters belong to Sanskriti Bachao Manch (Save the Culture Forum), a hardline Hindu organization in Madhya Pradesh's capital city, Bhopal. The element of objective reality that has their knickers in a painful knot is, ironically enough, lingerie. These paragons of virtue know such things exist, but they won’t tolerate having shopkeepers deploying them in ‘raunchy’ advertisements or on display window mannequins.

These Hindu hammerheads demand that shopkeepers clean up their act, OR ELSE:

‘...[The knickers phobic knuckleheads] have threatened to seize and burn any visible knickers or bras on Monday.

"Three days from now if undergarments are still hanging outside, we will light a bonfire of the lingerie," the forum's leader Chandra Shekhar Tiwar told AFP on Friday. "No hanging of underwear in public," he added.

The group said in its first warning to shopkeepers on Wednesday that they should keep lingerie in boxes and only show this to customers when they asked. On Thursday, members of the group tore down posters advertising coffee-flavoured condoms and sexual-dysfunction therapy centres as part of their campaign to protect "traditional Indian values."

They also asked cinema owners not to put up posters of film stars in "offensive" clothes and postures. On Monday, the state's chief minister, Shivraj Singh Chouhan from the Hindu BJP party, also ordered municipal authorities across the state to remove the advertising hoardings of a spa massage centre. A police case was registered against the spa owner for displaying what the chief minister called "obscene" advertising displaying a woman's bare back...’

These smugly sanctimonious Morality Nazis give me a pain where the sun doesn’t shine. These assholes can bray about their piety until the sacred bovines answer the dinner bell, for all the good it will do them. I see no difference between their bullshit and the older than dirt protection racket which is perpetrated by head breaking, gangster, scumbags who don’t put on these holy roller airs.

How many times must I repeat this: the inherent ‘right’ not to be offended DOES NOT EXIST.

A Religion of Peace Twofer
Source: PIG News Wire [01/08/10]

Tooned For Revenge In Denmark
Armed with an axe and a knife, a 28-year-old Somali Jihadikaze invaded the home occupied by 75-year old Danish cartoonist, Kurt Westergaard on a Friday evening. This religion of peace piece of crap was NOT there for a chat. In fact, in the name of his peaceful religion, this Jihadikaze scumbag was determined to, forcibly evict Kurt from the human gene pool, because of Kurt’s legendary Mohammad cartoon.

Mr. Westergaard, 75, who had his 5-year-old granddaughter on a sleepover, called the police and sought shelter in a specially made safe room in the house, the police said.

Officers arrived two minutes later and tried to arrest the suspect, who wielded an ax at a police officer. The officer then shot the man.

Mr. Westergaard could not be reached for comment. According to his employer, the newspaper Jyllands-Posten, Mr. Westergaard said the assailant had shouted “revenge” and “blood” when trying to enter the room where he and his grandchild had sought shelter. (New York Times)

In a perfect world, the proper authorities would have gunned this Jihadikaze rat bastard down like a dog, when he ‘tried to escape’. Tragically, they only wounded this scumbag, so this murdering piece of shit will live to try, try again.

Elections Have Deadly Consequences
The Jihadikazes smell blood in the water, after Uncle Sam, electorally, slashed his own wrists by putting the Appeaser-In-Chief in charge of the war with murdering Mecca Maniac rat bastards. Sensing that the tide of war has turned, in his favor, Osama, and his minions, are ready, willing, and eager to relocate the front lines of the war inside the Great Satan’s own borders.

A top counterterrorism official is warning that Al Qaeda and other extremists are working to test U.S. defenses and launch an attack on American soil. National Counterterrorism Center Director Michael Leiter says the failed Christmas Day attempt to bring down a U.S. airliner is the starkest reminder of that threat.

Leiter said in a statement Saturday that officials "know with absolute certainty" that Al Qaeda and others are trying to refine their methods.

The center is part of the Office of the Director of National Intelligence. It draws experts from the CIA, FBI, Pentagon and other agencies who try to ensure that clues about potential attacks are not missed. Terrorism expert Harvey Kushner of Long Island University said a significant concern is that many U.S. airports don't currently have the necessary technology to protect flights from the type of explosives attack attempted on Christmas. (Fox)

Neal Boortz is right, when he warns that ‘elections have consequences’. In this instance, the primary consequence will be hundreds, perhaps thousands, of dead Americans who will get murdered inside our own nation. Those Americans will die, because Messiah Barry is too busy admiring his own reflection in the mirror to perform his number one job: keeping Americans safe from murderous Jihadikaze rat bastards.

Apparently, Mecca Maniac peace is achieved, when all of the infidels - especially Americans - are dead. I know it and you know it, but why is this breaking news to the moonbats who infest our nation’s capitol?

Rapturous News
Source: PIG News Wire [12/31/09]

After crunching the numbers, a ‘bible scholar’, 88 year old Harold Camping, has sounded the all clear on the Mayan Doomsday. In fact, if you bring up the subject to Harold, he airs a ‘hearty chuckle’. Why? You’ll be thrilled.

December 21, 2012 is, Harold assures us, no big deal. For starters, Harold insists that it’s a date without ‘one stitch of biblical authority’. Furthermore, by that date, it will all be over and done, except for the shouting. Why? Harold and his abacus ran the numbers and calculated the REAL end of the world: May 21, 2011. Game, set, match? Perhaps.

However...

This isn’t the first time that Harold has crunched some numbers and arrived at an important, Cross Cult Calendar Calculation:

On Sept. 6, 1994, dozens of Camping's believers gathered inside Alameda's Veterans Memorial Building to await the return of Christ, an event Camping had promised for two years. Followers dressed children in their Sunday best and held Bibles open-faced toward heaven.

But the world did not end. Camping allowed that he may have made a mathematical error. He spent the next decade running new calculations, as well as overseeing a media company that has grown significantly in size and reach. (S.F. Gate)

Since I need a confirmation from our Professor of Piety, PIGster J, I’ll help him out, by passing along the key elements of Harold’s Doomsday Math, as reported by S.F. Gate:

By Camping's understanding, the Bible was dictated by God and every word and number carries a spiritual significance. He noticed that particular numbers appeared in the Bible at the same time particular themes are discussed.

The number 5, Camping concluded, equals "atonement." Ten is "completeness." Seventeen means "heaven." Camping patiently explained how he reached his conclusion for May 21, 2011.

"Christ hung on the cross April 1, 33 A.D.," he began. "Now go to April 1 of 2011 A.D., and that's 1,978 years."

Camping then multiplied 1,978 by 365.2422 days - the number of days in each solar year, not to be confused with a calendar year.

Next, Camping noted that April 1 to May 21 encompasses 51 days. Add 51 to the sum of previous multiplication total, and it equals 722,500.

Camping realized that (5 x 10 x 17) x (5 x 10 x 17) = 722,500.

Or put into words: (Atonement x Completeness x Heaven), squared.

"Five times 10 times 17 is telling you a story. It's the story from the time Christ made payment for your sins until you're completely saved. I tell ya, I just about fell off my chair when I realized that," Camping said.

Another Tome expert, James Kreuger, points out that Harold’s math doesn’t mesh with a famous Tome verse:

"For all his learning, Camping makes a classic beginner's mistake when he sets a date for Christ's return," Kreuger wrote in an e-mail. "Jesus himself said in Matthew 24:36, 'Of that day and hour knows no man, no, not the angels of heaven, but my father only.'"

May 21, 2011? December 21, 2012? I think they’re both wrong. For this land conceived in liberty, we’ve already had our Doomsday: January 20, 2009. Somehow, neither Harold Camping nor James Kreuger spotted that one.

Grinch Glut
Source: Hambo’s Hammer [12/25/09]

Grinches were out in force, this year, in the final days, before the Jolly Old Elf made his epic flight around the world.

Item: The ‘Tinsel Taliban’
A Brit court, the Warwickshire Justice Centre in Nuneaton, has banned tinsel and other decorations. The usual suspects insist that it has nothing to do with notoriously tolerant Mecca Maniacs. Hambo responds: What a load of camel crap!

The Daily Mail spewed out these Grinchy tidbits:

[T]he Government denied the charge that the ban had been put in place to ensure Muslims were not offended. They said it was because they would be insensitive for criminals to have to pay fines in a room surrounded by tinsel.

However, one courts worker wrote to community cohesion minister Sayeeda Warsi to say he had been told the ban had been imposed because tinsel would 'break the Court Service Diversity Policy'.

This commits court service managers to 'creating a culture where equality and diversity forms an integral part of everyday working life' and 'incorporating equality and diversity into day-to-day management activities'.

Baroness Warsi spoke out after receiving a letter from a worker at the centre who said: 'I work as an admin officer in the county court and we have been told that we can't put tinsel around our counter window as it might offend other religions, according to HMCS diversity policy.'

Tinsel gives law breaking buttheads a boo-boo? Grinch shit!

Item: Southern-Fried Grinchiness
Demonstrating their long reach, the professional Grinches at the Wisconsin-based Freedom From Religion Foundation, went godlessly Grinchey over a nativity scene in a Charleston (South Carolina) fire station.

[The whining pissants] sent a letter dated Dec. 17 to Mayor Joe Riley and Fire Chief Thomas Carr notifying them of the city's Constitutional breach and requesting removal of the creche from the fire station. The letter expressed dismay that the problem has occurred for at least six years. A local resident had complained to the organization about the creche, the letter states.

"As you are aware, this display has been erected each year in December since at least 2004," wrote Freedom From Religion Foundation staff attorney Rebecca S. Kratz. "Last year's display included an illuminated Latin cross (the preeminent symbol of Christianity) atop the firehouse roof. We were pleased to learn that as of the date of this letter, the Fire Department appears to be honoring the separation of church and state by at least not displaying a Latin cross this year." (Fox)

Our Professor of Piety, PIGster J, will be pleased to learn that, although the fire station removed the nativity scene, a white, illuminated, cross is still on display, next to the stone memorial for 9 firefighters who died in a 2007 fire.

Item: Health & Safety Asshats Diss Deer
Eager to spice up the Christmas shopping season, the relevant officials in Market Harborough (East Midlands, J.O.E.) lined up a dozen reindeer to make a personal appearance. No harm, no foul? You know better:

[Health & Safety asshats] banned the animals from parading round the town square after ruling it was too dangerous --because it might snow. Officials put up posters saying: 'There is a risk of slips and falls to attendees at the event, when the conditions get worse.' (Daily Mail)

Somehow, the mere presence of reindeer makes ice and snow covered sidewalks slippery? That’s bullshit, and at least one rational Brit adult agrees:

Malcolm Lever-Jones, independent traders' spokesman, said: 'It is health and safety gone barmy and completely ruined the festive mood. Hundreds of people had come from up to 40 miles away and were dreadfully disappointed. The council said there was a risk of snow and ice to pedestrians but with or without the reindeer the streets were still icy. None of the town centre was cordoned off. It just made no sense." He estimated the cost to the taxpayer of cancelling Friday's event at around £10,000. (Daily Mail)

This just in! Ice is slippery. Film at 11!

Item: Angel Jihad In Mexifornia
Our Grinch is a disabled, 65 year old Marine veteran who should be thanked for his service then told to STFU when he’s feeling Grinchy.

Stars and other religious emblems were ordered removed from Christmas trees in all government buildings in Sonoma County on Monday following a complaint by Irv Sutley, a disabled 65-year-old Marine veteran who said the symbols were "extremely offensive" and part of the "cult" of Christianity.

"I just don't believe government has the right to intrude on anyone and force them into sectarian behavior," Sutley told FoxNews.com. "I've opposed Buddhist statues, the star of David — anything of a religious nature."

Sutley said he filed the complaint with acting County Administrator Chris Thomas on Dec. 18 after noticing an angel atop a six-foot tree in the lobby of the county recorder's office. Sutley, a lifelong atheist and chairman of the county's Peace and Freedom Party, said he visited the office last week for his re-election bid next June. (Fox)

Since this one came from a Professor of Piety tip, I’ll let him have the final word.

Do you have a “bitter, hard hearted jerk” award? If you do, I nominate this guy. Sheesh. What a pity he doesn’t devote all that energy to bettering his fellow man instead of stepping on them.

Item: Cross Cult Tolerance
Admittedly, the lion’s share of Grinch outbursts are perpetrated to secularists, ACLU scumbags, and/or atheists, all of whom desperately need to get a life. There is, as this item demonstrates, the occasional exception, when some Cross Cultist leaves his ‘turn the other cheek’ in his other pants.

The seasonal bone of contention in this one isn’t a nativity scene, a menorah, or a cross, it’s a dose of snarky seasonal prose perpetrated by our old pals, the Freedom From Religion Foundation:

"At the time of the winter solstice, let reason prevail. There are no gods, no devils, no angels, no heaven or hell. There is only our natural world. Religion is just myth and superstition that hardens hearts and enslaves minds."

The prime mover in this tale of tolerance is one of Messiah Barry’s Land of Lincoln homeboys, a - GASP - conservative activist who is a candidate for Illinois state comptroller. His name is William J. Kelly, and he’s, apparently, a steadfast believer in the right - HIS RIGHT, OF COURSE - not to be offended. Billy whines that the sign "mocks religion", making it, in his fevered brain, HATE SPEECH: "I don't think the State of Illinois has any business denigrating or mocking any religion and I think that's what the verbiage on the sign was doing."

Unwilling to tolerate the presence of words he didn’t want to hear, Big Bad Billy tried to put the offensive - to him - words out of his misery:

William J. Kelly announced Tuesday that he planned to take down the sign put up by the Freedom from Religion Foundation, and on Wednesday, he tried to make good on his plan. But Kelly said when he turned the sign around so it was face down, state Capitol police were quick to escort him away.

Illinois Secretary of State's office spokeswoman Henry Haupt said Kelly was escorted from the rotunda by state Capitol police, who briefly detained him, wrote an incident report, and directed him to leave the building. "It doesn't matter how we feel about the message on a display," Haupt said. "Our obligation is to protect the property within the state Capitol building, and we would do the same for any other display." (CBS)

Billy, dude, I have a hot flash for you. Speech is NOT limited to what you want to hear. It’s time to get over yourself, smugly sanctimonious Sparky.

Morality Meathead Twofer
Source: PIG’s Golden Oinks [12/18/09]

Little Donny Wildmon
Eager to be ‘inclusive’, at this festive time of the year, the Educrats running Lantern Road Elementary School in Fishers, Indiana, decided to let everyone strut their holiday stuff during a program mounted by the school’s second graders. In addition to Christmas and Hanukkah, the presentation included salutes to Ramadan, Las Posadas, and Kwanzaa. No harm, no foul? It should have been, but wasn’t.

When they heard that the program included the phrase "Allah is God", the usual suspects went postal on the Lantern Road Elementary Educrats, who promptly beat a hasty retreat. The usual suspects, in this case, are Donny Wildmon’s American Family Association, who had a memorable, Islamikazes in the woodpile, meltdown over "Allah".

The fun fact about "Allah" is that it’s nothing more sinister than the Arabic word for God. Furthermore, it is NOT restricted to Arabic speaking Mecca Maniacs, since it is used by Arabic-speaking Jews, Christians, and assorted other, Arabic-speaking, supernaturalists.

L. Brent Bozell III
Unwilling to let Little Donny Wildmon hog the Morality Meathead spotlight, Brent Bozell unleashed his PTC (Parents Television Council) minions on their favorite whipping boy, ‘Family Guy’. ‘Family Guy’ again? You better believe it, Morality Muzzle Sparky.

The Parents Television Council has filed an indecency complaint against Family Guy, a show that is frequently in PTC's dog house over its edgy content. This time, PTC is complaining about the Dec. 13 episode featuring a scene with a stripper giving a lap dance to Peter's father-in-law.

"Apparently Fox must believe that because the program is animated it can air anything it wants on Family Guy no matter how inappropriate or indecent..." said PTC President Tim Winter. (Broadcast & Cable)

If a lap dance on an animated boob tube show is the biggest problem the PTC can find in this first year of the Obamunist Error, Brent needs to pull his head out of his ass. Our inalienable individual liberty is under unrelenting assault, from sea to shining sea, and a cartoonish lap dance is your biggest beef. Wake the f**k up!

Strange Doings In North Carolina
Source: Hambo’s Hammer [12/10/09]

As far as a majority of the relevant chad punchers were concerned, Cecil Bothwell was the best man for an up for grabs slot on a North Carolina city council. After election day, Cecil’s political career hit a speed bump named H. K. Edgerton, who is the former president of Ashville’s NAACP chapter. I know what you’re thinking, but it’s not THAT.

Edgerton’s beef with Cecil isn’t racial, as far as I can tell. It is, according to Edgerton, supernatural. Edgerton is using the North Carolina state constitution to black flag Cecil because Cecil is - TA DA - an atheist:

Article 6, section 8 of the state constitution says: “The following persons shall be disqualified for office: First, any person who shall deny the being of Almighty God.” (Hot Air)

It is, as Edgerton insists, state law. If Cecil takes the matter to court, it's a state law that's is probably going to get nuked. Why? We've already traveled down this road. In 1961, the Supreme Court overturned Maryland’s ‘constitutional bar for public office on religious affiliation’. Cecil will probably win this one, in the LONG run, but short term, his prospects aren’t as bright.

If there is going to be a religious litmus test for elected office, there’s only one way that it passes muster for this pagan scribbler. The religious litmus test I have in mind would be imposed, by each individual voter, when he, she, heshe, or it enters the voting booth. All other forms of this bullshit are loathsome.

When it comes to religious litmus tests, North Carolina’s ban on atheists is no better than the bans on Christians and/or Jews in nations controlled by Mecca Maniacs.

When you cut through all the crap, and focus on the basics, the issues at hand are clear. We are forced to choose between a nation built upon inalienable individual liberty, and a nation dominated by the mercurial whims of a tyrannical majority. For those who give a damn, I’ll flesh out this point, by citing a passage, or two, from a venerable pagan scribbler rant.

This uniquely American doctrine of inalienable individual liberty was, eloquently, set forth in the Declaration of Independence. Later, our Constitution imposed explicit restrictions on the government’s activities, placing our inherent, individual rights, our birthright, beyond the reach of aspiring tyrants. The central, non-negotiable fact of American life is that a sovereign individual’s inalienable rights cannot be voted away, nor are they subservient to a tyrannical majority’s mercurial moods. Too often, we lose sight of the essential truth that individual liberty is not a popularity contest, nor is it determined by opinion polls. The underlying concept that forms the our country’s foundation is not, never has been, whatever the majority wants is cool. The Declaration of Independence, our Constitution and the Bill of Rights were not written to enforce the majority’s fickle whims. These documents were specifically written to protect the inalienable rights of the minority from the tyranny of the majority, especially if said minority is one sovereign individual.

It’s always easier to steadfastly defend the inalienable rights of individuals with whom we agree. The real test of our principles comes, when we must steadfastly defend the inherent, inalienable rights of someone with whom we vehemently disagree. This clash between inherent, individual liberty and one’s personal beliefs is most contentious, if religion is involved. Too many American true believers feel that their visceral, religious obsession automatically repeals the inherent, inalienable rights of sovereign, non-believing individuals. Our birthright of inalienable, individual rights is not, cannot be, negated by the prevailing supernaturalism of the majority. None of America’s ‘god-fearing’ founding fathers would deem it a proper role for the government that they toiled so hard to create to infringe on the inalienable rights of a sovereign atheist individual.

Parting shot: If this religious litmus test stands, it’s a very slipper slope which inexorably pulls all of us down into a gaping chasm, named tyranny.

Cherry Mama Visit Aftershocks
Source: Golden Oinks [12/04/09]

If you’re a veteran PIGster, you’ll remember a pair of stories about a highly-publicized Cherry Mama personal appearance in Knock (Ireland). You’ll be thrilled to learn that the festivities left a lasting impression on the thousands who attended this Cherry Mama encounter. How lasting? According to an article in Discover magazine, it made a VERY lasting impression on some of the attendees, who spent quality time staring at the Sun, where Cherry Mama was strutting her celestial stuff.

In this case, the name of the impression is ‘solar retinopathy’, which is - TA DA - damage to the eye resulting from staring directly at the SUN.

Dr Eamonn O’Donoghue, a consultant ophthalmologist surgeon in University Hospital Galway, says the hospital would usually see one case of solar retinopathy “at most” per year.

However, this year there have been five such cases, all of which have been linked to events at Knock.

Dr O’Donoghue said people needed to be warned of the condition as it was “potentially very, very dangerous” and could cause long-term damage to the most vulnerable part of the eye.

“These people came in because they have had a significant reduction in their vision and they could very well be a smaller representative sample,” Dr O’Donoghue said, adding that two of those who had presented to the hospital had also reported that other members of their families had suffered visual damage. (Discover Magazine)

Faith shall move mountains? Perhaps, but it won’t save your eyes from harm if you stare directly at the Sun.

Closing Its Doors
Source: Hambo’s Hammer [12/03/09]

Until it hit the fan, writer, documentary film maker, and sometimes radio host, John Ziegler was Tiger Woods’ biggest fan. In fact, John seemed to have a Chris Matthews class, leg tingling, man crush on Tiger, before his hero shamed him back to sanity:

John Ziegler, the pastor of the "First Church of Tiger Woods" -- www.tigerwoodsisgod.com -- has announced in a statement on the blog that the organization is being dissolved because of the golfer's "personal sins."

The church, whose home page has now been rechristened "The Damnation of Tiger Woods,"was launched by radio host Ziegler in 1996 to "celebrate the emergence of the 'true messiah.'"

However the lurid revelations that have swirled around Woods since last week have left Ziegler so disenchanted that he is now ending his church, which has its own "Prayer for Tiger" and "Ten Tiger Commandments."

"After several days of evaluation, I have decided to disband the First Church of Tiger Woods," Ziegler wrote. "Tiger is clearly no longer deserving of being seen as a role model or a hero and he has needlessly squandered his unique potential to be a positive force in our country and the world. "While I am relatively sure that Tiger will make a comeback from this sad episode and that there will be great moments for him in the future, I personally am done with Tiger Woods." (AFP)

Is this the end for Johnny and his beloved Tiger, or can these two crazy kids patch things up? It’s stay tuned time in Hamboland.

 

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