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PIG NEWS DIGEST | ONLY IN MEXIFORNIA

DECEMBER 2006

Beserkeley Strikes Again
Source: PIG’s Lunatic Lefty News Wire [12/19/06]

With all of its major problems solved to their satisfaction, the hacks elected to torment the denizens of Beserkeley (Mexifornia) addressed one of the universe’s smallest "problems". Actually, affixing the "problem" label is premature, since, to date, nobody has found any major or minor deleterious effects of a new flavor of cutting edge science called "nanotechnology". When I call this goodie "small", it’s not the usual pagan scribbler hyperbole. According to the Contra Costa Times, "nano-size particles" can be "as small as one-millionth the width of the head of a pin". Nanotechnology is being used to develop new products and materials by tweaking structures at the atomic and molecular level. For reasons that make perfect sense in Beserkeley, that’s giving the city council heartburn.

The new, unanimously approved edict "compels researchers and manufacturers to report what nanotechnology materials they are working with and how they are handling them". That’s all well and good, but there’s one pesky problem. The primary outfit gearing up for a run of nanotechnology research, Lawrence Berkeley Laboratory, isn’t under the city hacks' thumb, since it’s governed by the Department of Energy. The lab’s brain trust gave lip service to "working with the city" but I wouldn’t wager the proverbial agricultural endeavor on their willing, eager, full cooperation. A resounding "Bite me, paranoid lefty scumbags" is much more likely.

Gulag Ban’s Cookie Aroma
Source: Golden Oinks 2006 [12/08/06]

The Gulag continues to amaze and amuse this pagan scribbler with its differently-rational antics. This particular journey into Korrectnik lunacy began when a Mexifornia cabal, the California Milk Processor Board, decided to tout their products at various bus stops in the Gulag with aromatic strips that emitted the spiffy aroma of chocolate chip cookies. Who could possible object to such a harmless marketing idea? The answer to that burning question came the first day the chocolate chip cookie scented ads were deployed:

‘...before the day was over, the Municipal Transportation Agency, which runs the city's public transit system and has jurisdiction over the bus shelters, sent a letter to the company that arranges bus shelter advertising and asked that the aromatic campaign be discontinued immediately...’

‘...The action came after activists complained that the aroma could trigger asthma attacks and allergic reactions in people who are scent sensitive, said Nathaniel Ford, executive director of the Municipal Transportation Agency...’ (S.F. Chronicle)

A rational adult with the ad agency, Stephen Shinn (a V.P. with CBS Outdoor), pointed out that the scented strips do not constitute a threat to anybody since they contain no chemicals and are not a health risk to the public. Don’t hold your breath waiting for the Gulag’s chronic whiners to stand up and salute that. Why? "A lot of people are sensitive to (scents) and some people find it offensive," whines the Municipal Transportation Agency’s director, Peter Mezey.

Banning the chocolate chip cookie aroma ads takes asinine to a whole new level. If "Whine, whine, whine" isn’t the Gulag’s motto, it damn sure should be.

NOVEMBER 2006

Dog Food Settlement Scuttled in L.A.
Source: PIG’s Fun Facts [11/30/06]

The news from the City of Angels is mixed, this week. We’re guardedly optimistic after reading that race card wrangler, Tennie Pierce, hit another speed bump on the road to tax funded enrichment Wednesday. You should remember Tennie as the fireman who is trying to turn a firehouse prank into an $2.7 million dollar payday. His close encounter with an "Alpo" snack came after a rousing volleyball game when Tennie annoyed everyone with his relentless bellowing about "feeding the Big Dog" (Big Dog is a nickname that Tennie pinned on himself). I don’t know about you, but "feeding" the Big Dog some dog food with his spaghetti sounds like a joke to me. Only a race hustler like Tennie would try to turn it into something it’s not: a racist incident.

We’re pleased to report that, finally, the L.A. City Council found enough spine to sustain the mayor’s veto of the $2.7 million dollar settlement. By a 9-6 margin, they ignored the blatant attempt by some City of Angels Ethnocrats to intimidate them into shelling out the taxpayers money to their homeboy, Tennie. The case now heads for trial where Tennie’s chances should be piss poor. "Should be". Let’s not forget that another L.A. jury - the infamous O. J. jury - stood justice on its ear by acquitting a double murderer. Will history repeat itself in another L.A. courtroom? Stay tuned PIGsters.

Another Peace Pinhead Antic
Source: AP [11/20/06]

Peace Pinheads Donna Sheehan and Paul Reffel are convinced that world peace can be achieved with one massive, post-orgasmic sigh. Undaunted by the sheer irrationality of their notion, these Marin County (Mexifornia) meatheads are beavering away on a peacenik notion they call the "Global Orgasm for Peace". If, they opine, enough people around the world will try to achieve the "Big-O" at the same time on December 22, world peace could ensue in short order.

The underlying notion opines that war is, essentially, a dude thing. It’s an outgrowth, they insist of the inherent "My tool is bigger than yours" crap that is so meaningful when a dude tries to impress a female into propagating the human species. War, these two insist, is the same concept at work: "My missile is bigger than your missile". The preferred weapon to counteract this male obsession with the size of various "tools" is, they insist, the orgasm:

"The orgasm gives out an incredible feeling of peace during it and after it. Your mind is like a blank. It's like a meditative state. And mass meditations have been shown to make a change...The dream is to have everyone in the world (take part). And if that means laying down your gun for a few minutes, then hey, all the better." (Paul Reffel as quoted by AP)

The good news is that this notion is, on balance, no harm, no foul. That bad news is that you’ve got a snowball’s chance in Hell of talking that Hooters hottie into getting horizontal and squishy with you on December 22 for the greater glory of world peace. If you decided to try that one on some hottie, please pack a video camera to record the ensuing fun.

Mexifornia Town Outlaws Smoking?
Source: San Mateo County Daily Journal [11/16/06]

Individual liberty is an alien concept in Belmont (Mexifornia) and for proof, you need look no farther than the city council which is poised to ban smoking everywhere, except in single detached family dwellings. Actually, if you listen to an aspiring tyrant named Dave Warden, even that "single family dwelling" exception is intolerable. Dave is a Belmont city councilman and he’s what happens when you give Marxist rat bastards unrestricted power:

“We have a tremendous opportunity here. We need to pass as stringent a law as we can, I would like to make it illegal.” (Dave Miller)

Dave isn’t the only myopic Marxist mutant on the city council. Council bitch Coralin Feierbach wants to ban it outright, too: "I would just like to say ‘no smoking’ and see what happens".

When these Marxist hacks painted their Smoke Nazi bull’s-eye on inalienable individual liberty, there wasn’t a single rational adult around to say "shut your goddamn pie holes, Gulag breath, this is still the United States of America and you can’t do that so back off". We’re sad to report that the rabble cheered the Belmont Central Committee’s plan to outlaw smoking. They cheered because this Draconian edict will be aimed at someone else’s rights. How will they feel when Dave Warden comes after them? And make no mistake Belmont rabble, he will come after you, too. It’s only a matter of time.

More Pledge Angst in Mexifornia
Source: Reuters [11/09/06]

Located in the heart of Mexifornia’s notoriously conservative enclave - Orange County - the Orange Coast Community College is no stranger to differently-conservative student outbursts. This week, a student cabal - the student trustees - thrilled the socks off the VRWC when they banned the recitation of the Pledge of Allegiance at their meetings. A Reuters piece shares these telling tidbits:

‘...The move was lead by three recently elected student trustees, who ran for office wearing revolutionary-style berets and said they do not believe in publicly swearing an oath to the American flag and government at their school. One student trustee voted against the measure, which does not apply to other student groups or campus meetings...’

‘..."That ('under God') part is sort of offensive to me," student trustee Jason Bell, who proposed the ban, told Reuters. "I am an atheist and a socialist, and if you know your history, you know that 'under God' was inserted during the McCarthy era and was directly designed to destroy my ideology."

Bell said the ban largely came about because the trustees didn't want to publicly vow loyalty to the American government before their meetings. "Loyalty ought to be something the government earns through performance, not through reciting a pledge."...’

When asked about the furor, an OCC spokeswench shrugged it off: "If their personal belief is that they don't want to say the Pledge of Allegiance, the district certainly isn't going to dictate what they do."

OCTOBER 2006

Show and Yell in Mexifornia
Source: AP [10/20/06]

A Mexifornia Superior Court Judge, Robert W. Armstrong, made a stop the presses ruling that should thrill the socks off certain female Mexifornians. The case involved a 14 year old boy who complained to mom when the 40 something woman who lived next door stripped off and showed the lad her "naughty bits". Since the lad ran inside to complain, it’s a safe bet that the booty being bared was less than stellar.

Judge Armstrong studied the relevant law, then decreed that, although the woman had indeed flashed the lad, she didn’t break the law. He went on the explain that a man doing the same damn thing would be convicted, because the law only talks about someone who "exposes his person". For Judge Armstrong "his" is the relevant word. No woman could fit the specifics of this law, so the judge dismissed the indecent exposure charge.

Prosecutors are making noises about appealing the case, basing their appeal on another section of state law that says "words used in the masculine gender include the feminine and the neuter". Will this ruling be overturned? Probably, in a rational world, but the term "rational" seems to exclude Mexifornia.

Mexifornia Fun and Games
Source: PIG News Wire [10/12/06]

Donkey Clan Whining
Donkey Clan hacks started whining the instant they learned that Mexifornia’s action hero governor was invited to be a guest on Jay Leno’s Tonight Show. The day of the taping, a motley collection of paid union agitators, and assorted other Donkey Clan minions gathered outside the studio for a media event that was alleged to be a protest. Whining that the action hero’s appearance was a "campaign donation", the Donkey Clan demands that Jay Leno invite their candidate - Phil "The Most Boring Pinhead Ever Born" Angelides - as a guest to give him "equal time". One Donkey Clan hack, Congresspunk Xavier Becerra, filed an FCC complaint about the Terminator’s appearance on the Tonight Show.

Will Jay Leno allow his ratings to be nuked by inviting this terminally boring whiner on his show? We don’t know, but stranger things have happened.

Sneaky School Board Antics
While the City of Angels’ colonista mayor is off celebrating his coronation as the Los Angeles Unified School District’s white knight with a junket to Asia, the LAUSD school board, pulled the rug out from under Mayor Reconquista. Still miffed that the state’s Marxist asshats gave Mayor Villaraigosa a hand in the running of LAUSD starting in January 2007, the school board ignored Mayor Photo-Op’s pleas to let him "participate’ in the naming of a new LAUSD superintendent. Instead, while the mayor is gallivanting from one Asian photo-op to the next, the LAUSD board named a new LAUSD superintendent.

As far as we can tell, the LAUSD made an excellent choice:

Name: Admiral David Brewer III, recently retired
Admiral Brewer has proven leadership skill that involved running a very large naval command.
Admiral Brewer is not tainted by the prevailing Educrap brain-farts oozing out of America’s Ivory Towers.
Admiral Brewer is a charismatic leader.
Admiral Brewer is his own man, not Mayor Reconquista’s hand-picked toady.

With stellar qualifications like that, this choice should be winning rave reviews from the mayor and the Marxist legicrats who want to see Mayor Reconquista win the Governor’s seat in 2010. Yeah, right. The mayor is livid and the legicrats who dream of a Governor Reconquista aren’t thrilled either.

These quotes put this political food fight into perspective:

"I'm a firm believer that you can't keep doing the same things and expect different results. To everyone in this community, I say I am not a reformer. I aim to transform this district ... This is a world where our children have to compete globally. We are going to shoot for a world-class district." (Admiral Davie Brewer III)

"The mayor is doing his job as the mayor of the city and we are doing what we were elected to do, to provide for the education of the children of the city." (LAUSD School Board President Marlene Canter)

"It is very disappointing the school board chose to ignore the clear will of the Legislature and governor and refused to include parents, teachers, the council of mayors and the larger Los Angeles community in their decision." (Marxist Legicrat, Assembly Speaker Fabian Nunez)

The professional Educrats put LAUSD in the crapper, so it makes no sense to let them keep control. PIG thinks that Admiral Brewer has the right stuff to make LAUSD’s sinking ship seaworthy again. He’s highly motivated, and best of all, Admiral Brewer doesn’t owe a damn thing to the relentlessly ambitious empty suit who lurks in the L.A. Mayor’s office.

More Terminator Turmoil
Source: Contra Costa Times [10/06/06]

Mexifornia’s action hero governor painted an election cycle bull’s-eye on himself Thursday while he was thrilling the attendees at a Lotus Clan shindig in the City of Angels called "The Moon Festival". For reasons known only to Arnold, he laid this prose about assimilation on the audience:

"They try to stay Mexican but try to be in America, so there's this back and forth. What I say to Mexicans is you have got to go immerse yourself and assimilate into American culture and become part of the American fabric. That's how America will embrace you. The secret -- if there is one -- to success, I was embraced by the American people because I love America, I love the language and I made every effort to become American." (Times)

If you think the usual Colonista suspects were giving the Terminator high-fives, guess again:

"Can we afford to have a governor who is at best ignorant and at worst living on stereotypes that are highly inaccurate?" We expect the governor to understand the people, history and population that he governs over. For him to say comments like that about Latinos and Mexicans is a reflection of his misunderstanding of the history of the Southwest." (Congresspunk Mike Honda)

"This reflects such a pattern of negativity and divisiveness and trying to create barriers between diverse populations in California." (Assemblyman Joe Coto)

Is it just us, or did the Terminator just strike a nerve with these Colonista pinheads? We thought we’d spill our brewskie when we heard about the reaction of L.A.’s Colonista mayor. He ranted and raved against the Terminator then insisted that every border jumping scumbag is ready willing and eager to assimilate, especially when it comes to learning English. What a load! Last time we visited L.A., the boob tube and boom box dial was crammed to overflowing with Spanish lingo programming. Yeah, right, dude, they’re going assimilation bonkers in L.A., trying to force American citizens to become MEXICANS.

So far, the Terminator isn’t backing down. Some cynical bright bulbs think that he’s shoring up his base for an October surprise. The smart money bets that Arnold’s rival in the governor’s race is thisclose to nailing the Terminator with some information or comments about Arnold’s views on immigration.

In the 21st century, American politics has devolved into a game called "Gotcha". We deserve better, but it’s highly unlikely that we’ll see any improvement in the foreseeable future.

SEPTEMBER 2006

Outrage In The Hood
Source: PIG’s Golden Oinks 2006 [09/29/06]

A notorious City of Angels whiner named Najee Ali has another wild hair lodged in his "activist" butt. It's called "Cocaine" but it's not what you think because this "Cocaine" is ingested as a liquid, not a powder. That's right weird product name fans, some capitialist bright bulb whipped together a new energy drink - buckets of sugar laced with tons of caffeine - and decided to thrill every-damn-body by naming it "Cocaine". Needless to say, Najee is far from amused:

"The coalition leaders have pledged to shut down any store or business in South L.A. that attempts to sell the Cocaine drink to our community. Cocaine use has killed, imprisoned, torn apart and devastated countless members of our community. The Cocaine energy drink will have a terrible impact on impressionable children." (CBS)

PIG suspects that "Cocaine" is headed for record sales. Why? The groups determined to eradicate it are doing just the opposite, making it a must have for every rebellious teenager from sea to shining sea. So far, in addition to Najee and his merry band of whiners, Redux Beverages has managed to register on the radar at the National Action Network, Community Coalition and Latino and African-American Leadership Alliance. Other anti-drug zealots worry that "Cocaine" will make "THE CHILDREN" try the real thing, or get hooked on caffeine. PIG thinks it's time for Najee and all the rest of them to grow a pair, get over it and stop giving "Cocaine" all this free publicity.

An Enriching Gulag Hack Scheme
Source: San Francisco Chronicle [09/25/06]

The Gulag hacks are hoping the city’s denizens are too distracted by the items at the top of the November 7th ballot to pay attention to a gem they call Charter Amendment C. In theory, this measure sounds simple enough: bring the salary for the city’s top 7 officials into line with comparable hack salaries in 5 other Bay Area counties. If passed, it would require that the pay rate for these 7 hacks would be "re-evaluated" every 5 years to make sure that they are "keeping pace" with officials from those 5 benchmark areas.

If this gem slips under the radar and gets approved it’s going to be very lucrative for these top 7 hacks. Mayor Gavin Newsom would get a whopping $44,000 a year pay raise. Sheriff Michael Hennessey would loot the taxpayer for an additional $55,000 a year, but he won’t be the only one getting this heavy duty increase. Similar raises would go to the district attorney, city attorney, public defender and assessor.

If you’re wondering how the rest of the city’s tax-funded employees are doing, wonder no more. According to this Chronicle piece, ‘salaries and benefits for San Francisco’s 27,000 workers jumped 15 percent this year’ ($381 million dollars total).

Normally, we’d be in a table-pounding furor over this blatant attempt to loot the taxpayer, but since this is the Gulag, we’re feeling annoyingly smug about the wound these lefties are imposing on themselves. That’s right, PIGsters, we’re going to say it again. These left coast loonies made this hell, it’s beyond fair that they burn in it.

Gulag Mulling New Pot Law
Source: San Francisco Chronicle [09/11/06]

In a city populated by lefties who would, quite likely, favor summary execution for tobacco smokers who light up in a public place, the city hacks are mulling new ways to make pot smokers feel very damn welcome in the city by the bay. A new law would do several things to make pot smokers feel welcome:

Require that the Gulag reject any federal funds that would fund investigations or prosecution of marijuana infractions.

Ban any federal agency from ‘commissioning or deputizing a city police officer’ to help them with marijuana cases.

Appoint an 11 member committee to make sure the cops aren’t spending time running down pot smokers.

The bottom line on this proposed ordinance is the fact that serious crime in the Gulag is up and the city’s central committee thinks the cops should be making that their top priority and leave pot smokers alone.

The Daring Pot Caper
Source: Marin Independent Journal (Mexifornia) [09/02/06]

As marijuana farming enterprises go, this one was huge. Tucked away in a rugged section of Marin County (Mexifornia), the growing operation featured no less than 6 camps, each of which served one or more pot patches. The best guess is that this growing operation has been in business for 3 or 4 years, perhaps longer. This Marin County fishwrap serves up these details:

‘...Some camps had raised platforms where bedding and kitchens were off the ground, with other separate and higher structures that appeared to be lookout facilities...’

‘...Several water collection systems supplied a set of deep, hand-dug, polyethylene-lined ponds that supplied gardens or other remote ponds lower on the slope, according to the water district...’

‘...The gardens contained about 1,000 plants each, fed by well-maintained drip irrigation systems. Terracing and individual, deeply dug planting holes were standard for each plot. Underbrush was cleared and trees were cut back to allow more sunlight in the gardens. Many trees were felled for use in camp structures. The camps also had facilities for drying and grooming plants...’

‘...Camps typically included propane cook stoves, kitchen pots, pans and utensils, bedding, tarps, car batteries - possibly to charge cell phones - and fresh supplies of food. Vegetable gardens were common...’ (Independent Journal)

Narrowly missing the ‘farmers’, the authorities cut down and bundled 20,000 pot plants. Since the nearest road is a 90 minute hike away, the authorities left guards at the location until they could bring in a chopper to cart out the evil weed. The guards did their job, for the most part, but there were some unexpected overnight losses. What losses? During the night person or persons unknown, eluded the guards and walked off with at least 1,200 of the bundled pot plants.

AUGUST 2006

Sikhs Square off With Cross Cultists
Source: Contra Costa Times [08/29/06]

A Contra Costa County (Mexifornia) Toll Booth thrilled the local Sikh population spitless with a pamphlet that paints a "you’re gonna burn, sinner" bull’s-eye on the Sikhs. The Cross Cult prose quoted in the fishwrap item is so nifty we’re compelled to share it:

‘..."Please Consider These Words of Love My SIKH Friend," by Pastor Kent Brandenburg of Bethel Baptist Church, combines faith-based arguments with the logic that because its prophecies "come true 100 percent," the Bible can be nothing else but the absolute truth. The 10 gurus who are the pillars of Sikhism "died and stayed dead," whereas Jesus Christ defeated death, Brandenburg wrote. "His resurrection, witnessed by over 500 people, sealed the fact that Jesus Christ is God. Without believing in Jesus Christ, you, my Sikh friend, will die in your sins, and in so doing, will be condemned to Hell forever."...’

"First, admit you are a sinner. Second, admit you deserve Hell for your sin. Third, call on the Lord Jesus Christ to save you from your sin while giving your life to him."

As fun as this prose is, it gets better. The Cross Cultists were passing out this "repent Sikh sinner" prose at something called a Sikh Spiritual Peace March. If you can’t predict that Sikh turbans are in a mega twist over this, you’re not paying attention. "Objectionable" is the nicest thing they said about a message that Pastor Brandenburg deemed a dose of "tough love" to these tragically misguided Sikh true believers.

Our PIGish instincts predict that this Sikh vs Cross Cult turban twister is just getting started. If anything terminally fun happens we’ll serve up all the tasty tidbits.

Booty Wrangler Protest in the Gulag
Source: San Francisco Chronicle [08/19/06]

The confrontation shapes up as a titanic struggle that pits the Gulag’s exotic dancers against the humorless NO NADS in the Commission on the Status of Women. The bone of contention involves the private viewing rooms that deep pocketed booty afficionados can rent to get a private show from the exotic dancer of their choice. The transaction is a lucrative one for the dancers and a thrill a minute for the paying customer. All things considered it should be "no harm, no foul".

The problem, according to the NO NADs involves certain paying customers who get carried away and try to sexually assault an unwilling dancer. The answer, according to the NO NADs, is to abolish the private viewing rooms. The answer, according to the exotic dancers, is for the city and its Korrectnik bureaucrats to butt the hell out, because those private rooms represent a large portion of their income.

Sexual assault is no joke, but it’s a matter that must be handled by the judicial system, not some Korrectness-addled bureaucrat. If the club won’t provide suitable protection for its employees, the dancers will leave and the club will be swimming in red ink. It would be nice if once, just once, the Gulag let the marketplace handle these things, but we’re not going to hold our breath waiting for that dose of sanity.

Banning Border Jumpers In Escondido
Source: AP [08/17/06]

"Our charge is to provide for the health and safety of the residents of Escondido. Is it wrong then to ask them to be here legally?" (Escondido councilman Ed Gallo)

After a rousing debate, the Escondido (Mexifornia) city council voted 3-2 to draw up ordinances that would nail individuals or businesses that provide housing or jobs to border jumping scumbag invaders. The ordinance would prohibit landlords from renting to border jumpers and would revoke business license for firms that hire border jumpers. The ordinance also makes English the city’s official language. If you think this sounds damn familiar, join the club. In fact, this AP item states that "the law was inspired by a similar measure passed last month in Hazelton, Pennsylvania".

Will the usual Colonista coddling suspects go postal over this Escondido ordinance? You better damn believe it, secure our damn borders Sparky.

Mexifornia Legicrap Daily Double
Source: PIG News Wire [08/12/06]

Another Nanny State Intrusion
Mexifornia's legicrats are ramming through "emergency" legicrap that will address an issue that has the whole state in turmoil. Is it immigration? Nope. Skyrocketing gas prices? Nope. You might as well give up because you're never going to guess in a million years. This "emergency" concerns the "unsanitary" conditions in the state's nail salons. Under this proposed edict, the state Board of Barbering and Cosmetology would be empowered to, immediately, suspend the license of any manicurist whose salon is a pigsty.

Mexifornia denizens must be thrilled to learn that their state's big issues have all been resolved, giving their elected tormentors time to play with this kind of bovine excrement.

State Senate Gets One Right?
By overwhelming margins, the state legislature sent a bill to Mexifornia's action hero governor that would protect Ivory Tower fishwraps from being censored by the school's administration. If this bill gets signed, henceforth, a college or university administrator who wants to censor a student fishwrap can only do so if the paper contains "hate speech". Since "hate speech" is, by and large, in the eye of the hypersensitive beholder, this bill isn't quite the ringing endorsement of inalienable individual liberty that it's touted to be. Flawed or not, it's better than nothing and should give Ivory Tower journalists a measure of editorial freedom.

Another Hack Steps In It
Source: PIG News Wire [08/04/06]

We hear that L.A.'s dynamic afternoon drive duo - KFI's John & Ken - are at it again. Last May, when all the border jumping scumbags were rampaging in the City of Angels' streets, L.A.'s colonista mayor, Antonio Villaraigosa, spewed drivel to his Sombrero Stomping home boys and girls about "We clean your toilets". Taking the idea and running with it, John & Ken flooded the mayor's office with toilet brushes. He was, to say the least, very unamused when he was deluged by thousands of toilet brushes.

Fast forward to the present and they're painting a talk radio bull's-eye on Mexifornia State Senator Don Perata who is begging for a John & Ken reality check. During a press briefing Donny boy stuck his foot in it with this prose: "Immigration is a red meat issue. You’ve got all these crackers down in San Diego taking on the governor. Even the governor was shocked. Those aren't the people I represent. But there is no point in getting into a pitched, vocal battle with these people. ... If you start getting engaged with these people, you get tar all over yourself." That easily, Don double dog dared John & Ken to flood his office with - you guessed it - crackers. you'd think that these elected tormentor pinheads would learn their lesson and stay away from product-related terminology.

If you want to send this Mexifornia pinhead some crackers or just want to drop a word bomb in his mailbox, all you need to do is link to - http://www.johnandkenshow.com/ - for all the spiffy 'here's how to give Donny boy a reality check' details.

JULY 2006

Another Gulag Brain-Fart
Source: S. F. Chronicle [07/29/06]

Korrectnik panties wadded up big damn time, late last year, after the Oakland Diocese of the Roman Catholic Church posted some "Roe vs Wade sucks" ads on the BART (Bay Area Rapid Transit) system. The usual group of whiners kicked up such a major fuss over them that the suits running BART surrendered to their caterwauling this week with new restrictions on advertising. The mantra is straight from the Korrectnik playbook "To maintain a safe and welcoming environment for all BART passengers". If you need a translation for that, we're all over it. BART's suits surrendered to the Korrectnik notion that the Gulag's left horde has the inherent "right" not to be offended.

According to this S. F. Chronicle whine, banned advertising topics include:

'...Overtly sexual images...'
Advertising that "ridicules or mocks, is abusive or hostile to or debases the dignity or stature of an individual or group of individuals".
'Images that show human or animal bodies or fetuses, that have been mutilated or disfigured...'

As fun as this is, this Korrectnik gem gets better. How? While BART is thisclose to imposing these "don't you dare set off the local Korrectniks" ad restrictions, the sales department at BART is trying to expand its advertising base. That's not going to be an easy task since it's a well-documented fact that capitalism itself, in all its diverse forms, gives Gulag pinheads a boo-boo.

Gulag Does What Comes Naturally
Source: S. F. Chronicle [07/25/06]

With housing prices in nose bleed territory, the Gulag's hacks decided to make it easier for their "down and out" constituents to bag a home in this lefty-infested enclave. Blissfully ignoring marketplace forces, the Board of Supervisors is running a 'affordable housing' edict up the flagpole. When it passes - a slam dunk - developers will be required to build "below market" housing in, or within spitting distance of, their development.

'...The signature feature of the proposed ordinance boosts the percentage of below-market units developers are required to rent or sell to 15 percent if those units are built on site and 20 percent if they are constructed at another location. Previously, those numbers were 12 and 17 percent, respectively. The new law would apply to developments of five or more units, down from 10 units under earlier rules...'

'...The new law is likely to affect not only where new inclusionary residences are built, but also who constructs them. If a developer chooses to build lower-income units off site and away from the new market-rate development, the law requires that the affordable units be located within a mile of the project. Developers can simply choose not to build affordable housing at all. But if they choose that option, they must pay the city a fee. In those cases, the city then distributes the funds to nonprofit, affordable and low-income housing developers, like BRIDGE. The nonprofit developers are then free to build the units wherever they can find land to accommodate them...' (S. F. Chronicle)

Once the fee for this "you build the damn things anywhere you can find room" is set, a developer's decision is reduced to simple mathematics. Will the buyers be thrilled spitless over paying for a home that's in the same hood with some "below market value housing", or will they be willing to pay a tad more for a new home and know that those "other people" are living a safe distance away? Unless the fee is Draconian, the choice is an easy one, because paying a fee liberates a developer from a ton of affordable housing red ink.

Colonista Whiners Boycott Disney
Source: PIG News Wire [07/19/06]

A Colonista group called Mexica Movment is, according to its own web site "More radical that you can image". Radical or not, they're living in the "English-free" zip code of the Twilight Zone. As fun as they sound, they didn't manage to register on PIG's vaunted Wingnut Radar system until they called Paul Harvey one of the "top racist Nazis in this campaign against our people" because Paul is "promoting racist hate against our people and [is] promoting an atmosphere of fear in our communities" (WND). The other dastardly racist in Mexica Movement's axis of Nazi racism is an L.A. based radio host named Doug McIntyre. He's the L.A. boom box host who is spearheading the battle to expose the tax dollar funded insanity at an L.A. Charter School. The charter school - Academia Semillas del Pueblo - is run by a "get off our ancestral land" pinhead named Marco Aguilar, a dude who is a reeking load of Colonista crap.

Outraged over these boom box reality checks, Mexia Movement is launching a boycott of Disney, the company that owns the network on which McIntyre and Harvey appear: ABC radio. These whiners spout this drivel about their boycott:

'...On its website, the Mexica Movement calls for "an immediate international boycott against The Walt Disney Company and all of its holdings. We are asking for this boycott because Disney has made a habit of hiring talk show hosts who spread the Minutemen white supremacist racist agenda against the Mexican and Central American communities in the United States."

The organization will continue calling for the Disney boycott, it says, "until we are assured of the immediate firing of all of Disney’s ABC racist radio terrorists who are spreading racist hate against the Mexican and Central American community by inciting threats of violence against us."...' (WND)

Call us names if you must, but PIG is ready, willing and able to give heartfelt props to anyone who riles up Colonista clowns like Mexia Movement.

Bringing the Gavel Down on Cellidiocy
Source: Sacramento News & Review [07/08/06]

U.S. District Judge William Shubb went postal recently, after a cellidiot's phone started ringing during the sentencing phase of a trial he was adjudicating. The cell blight went off at the worst possible time: while the judge was embroiled in the middle of a dicey legal argument. For all the thrilling details of the judge's heroic response to this interruption, we'll let the Sacramento News & Review do the heavy lifting:

'...“Shubb just stopped everything and said, 'Whose cell phone is that?’” one witness explained. It turned out that the phone belonged to a woman whom witnesses described as being in her mid- to late 60s. The woman dug around in her purse but couldn’t turn the offending device off. That’s when Shubb unplugged his microphone and left the bench.

“You have to imagine this little guy, all red in the face, his robes just flying in the wind,” one witness explained. Shubb reportedly stormed through the courtroom, repeating, “Whose cell phone is that? Whose cell phone is that?”

“Then, she just sort of meekly raised her hand,” one attorney continued. The judge demanded the woman hand the phone over. She did. Then, according to witnesses, he flung open the courtroom doors and chucked the phone down the hall. “I didn’t throw it; I tossed it,” Shubb said in his defense. “I just wanted it gone.”...' (News & Review)

Eventually, Judge Shubb apologized, sort of, but not really: "I'm sorry that had to happen. I wanted to make my point more strongly than I previously had done. I regret that I had to take such severe measures." That sounds to us like a non-negotiable "A man's gotta do what a man's gotta do." PIG gives props to Judge Shubb for striking a valiant blow against cellidiocy.

JUNE 2006

Mexifornia Fun and Games
Source: PIG News Wire [06/28/06]

Gulag (San Francisco)
The Gulag's Board of Supervisors tentatively approved a new ordinance that fines citizens who don't hide their trash cans in a timely manner after trash pickup day. If more than 24 hours passes since your trash pickup and the Trash Can Nazis can still see that trash can, a Gulag denizen gets hit with a $100 for the first offense, and $500 for repeat offenders. Big, big fun.

This is hypocrisy on a massive scale, coming as it does from the same elected tormentors who turn a blind eye to the fact that the city's homeless horde has turned the city's streets into an open cess pool. If the San Francisco Board of Supervisors is that determined to clean up the city, stopping the homeless horde from using the city streets as a toilet is a perfect place to start.

Concorde
Boldly going where they damn sure don't belong, the Concord City Council passed a new ordinance that will make it next to impossible for the city's landlords to convert their apartments into condos. Due to a "soft" rental market, landlords panicked the city's hacks with a tidal wave of condo conversion inquiries. Determined to make a bad situation catastrophic, the city council passed a new ordinance that caps the number of conversions at 5% of the existing 9,000 multifamily rental units. Big, big fun.

'...Under rules passed Tuesday night, landlords converting their rental units would have to provide two months' notice to current residents, give them first dibs on buying their units and provide a 7 percent discount on the purchase price. Converted condos with more than 25 units also would need to provide a recreational facility, such as a pool or play lot. The City Council scrapped a Planning Commission recommendation to require either 3 percent of each complex's converted units to be sold at affordable rates to low-income residents or 7 percent to those with moderate incomes...' (Contra Costa Times)

One councilman, Mark Peterson, pointed out that keeping the price of some units artificially low will force up the price for the other new condo units. That could, he worries, make the full price condos too expensive for the people most likely to buy them. PIG eagerly awaits the unavoidable marketplace reality check headed Concorde's way.

Berkeley
Beserkeley (Mexifornia) is determined to regain its liberal crown from the pretenders in Soviet Monica, Santa Cruz and Montgomery County (Maryland). How? This week the city council is expected to approve an initiative for the Nov 7th ballot that would allow the city's voters to decide a burning issue. What issue? If passed, the initiative would create a task force to monitor the actions of George W. Bush and Dick Cheney to gather the necessary proof to impeach them. That's right Beserkeley fans - and you know who you are - America's liberal wingnut capitol of the world has decided to impeach the President and Vice President. This ballot initiative would - if it gets on the ballot - make Beserkeley the first American city to let its voters decide if W needs to be impeached. File this one under "delusions of grandeur" in your Beserkeley archives.

Mexifornia News Roundup
Source: PIG News Wire [06/12]

San Francisco
A Mexifornia judge, James Warren, ruined the Gulag goons' whole day when he black flagged a recent Gulag voter initiative that banned handgun possession and firearm sales in the Gulag by the Bay. Among other things, the initiative violates an existing Mexifornia law that allows the sale and possession of handguns in the no longer "Golden" State.

Unwilling to let such petty nuisances as the Second Amendment and prevailing Mexifornia law spoil the fun, Gulag officials decided to take this case higher up the judicial food chain.

Los Angeles
The numbers are in and the reconquista charter school - Academia Semillas del Pueblo - that recently hit the VRWC news cycle with a resounding thud isn't setting the world on fire with it's educrap accomplishments:

It's Academic Performance Index score is a meager 577 for the 2005 school year.

577 is down from its far from stellar 2004 score of 585.

577 is 100 points lower than the LAUSD (Los Angeles Unified School District) average.

577 is 200 points lower than the Mexifornia average.

By any meaningful measure this charter school is an abject failure. Its umbilical to the taxpayer funded educrap coffers should be severed, ASAP.

Another Mexifornia Smoke Nazi Adventure
Source: Contra Costa Times [06/08/06]

In a 3-2 vote, the Dublin (Mexifornia) city council borrowed a page from the Calabasas Smoke Nazi playbook by giving Dublin citizens vigilante like powers when it comes to hounding uncooperative smokers. Rolling out the red carpet for the town's hypersensitive Smoke Nazi's, the city council made taking the smoker to small claims court, much, much easier. This means that any smoker in Dublin is dead meat the instant their Smoke Nazi neighbor imagines the he, she, heshe or it can smell your cigar, cigarette or pipe.

One of the lonely voices of reason in this Mexifornia Gulag is City Councilman George Zika, a dude who, quite rightly, asks where this green light for whiners ends:

"My wife is extremely allergic to cats and perfume. ... Should we make those a nuisance? Where do we stop? Where do we stop? People have to be responsible."

If you're a smoker who lives or visits Dublin, Mexifornia, be advised that this town's whiners are on a city-sanctioned rampage that can, and will, threaten your inalienable individual liberty.

City of Angels Daily Double
Source: PIG News Wire [06/06/06]

"Mansionization in the Political Hack Bull's-Eye"
The City of Angels is anything but angelic when it comes to a phenomenon called "mansionization". And what, exactly, is mansionization? In practice, it's expanding, rebuilding or replacing a modest, 2,000 - 3,000 square foot abode on a 5,000 square foot lot with a "mansionized" 7,000 square foot, multi-story behemoth on the same 5,000 square foot lot. According to the pinheads running L.A., this is intolerable. That's why they plan to ram through a new edict that will further erode, infringe and outright abolish a sovereign individual's property rights. When the dust settles, L.A. will enact something similar to the edict that's imposed on the Sunland-Tujunga area of Southern Mexifornia: property owners are restricted to a 2,400 square foot home on an 8,000 square foot lot.

PIG News dares to look beyond the obvious and ask the pertinent questions. Given the well-documented fact that up to 50 differently-legal "immigrants" will live in a single 1,200 square foot abode, isn't mansionization a viable solution? By mansionizing the abode to a spiffy 6,000 square feet, L.A.'s Colonista mayor could shoe horn half the population of Guadalajara into a single suburban L.A. dwelling. It's time, pardon the expression, for Mayor Reconquista to "think outside the box".

L.A.'s Film Permit Angst
According to the nonprofit cabal that handles film permits in the City of Angels, TV pilots being shot in the city are down at least 23% from the same period last year. In fact, FilmLA reports, that to date, 39 of 120 boob tube pilots are being shot elsewhere. This is due, in large part to tax incentives and fewer restrictions that are, routinely, packaged by cities seeking the cash infusion that a film company brings to their city. Unless L.A.'s Mayor Reconquista does something, stat, L.A. could easily loose the rest of it's lucrative film company revenue.

MAY 2006

MeChA Maniacs Impound Student Fishwrap
Source: World Net Daily [05/28/06]

From our can't win for losing desk, we bring you this action-packed report from the front lines of the Colonista assault on Mexifornia. Normally, when you see a headline about MeChA Maniacs stealing the entire run of a college fishwrap your first question is - and ought to be - what did the fishwrap say about Colonistas and/or MeChA that made these recoquistas go postal. As reasonable as that question is, the answer in this case is "nothing" and therein lies the problem.

The fishwrap flap started when some alert students at Pasadena City College (Southern MeChAfornia) noticed that all the copies of the Campus Courier were missing. The drama ramped up when a student reported someone grabbing an entire stack of the student fishwrap. The mystery reached critical mass when someone dropped off 2,000 shredded copies of the Courier in plastic bags. The note that accompanied the bags read:

We were very disappointed at the lack of coverage based on our high school conference. It has disheartened us to see no full length article, and a photo that did not represent our program.
Months of hard work went into our high school conference, and it was our hope to see recognition of our hard work in the campus newspaper.
We see this as a representative example of the attitude the Campus Courier has toward higher education, and towards MEChA.
As students of P.C.C., we can not accept this issue of the Campus Courier.
MEChA

Proving how utterly detached from reality these "get off our land, Gringo pigs" pinheads are, Professor James Aragon - one of MeChA's faculty advisors - insists that it's much too soon to blame MeChA for the fishwrap theft. Since he has no personal knowledge of any MeChA Maniac's involvement, blaming them is a dastardly plot to malign them. Somebody needs to increase the voltage on Jimmy's shock treatments, stat. MeChA's guilt is as simple as "THEY SIGNED THE GODDAMN NOTE" butt head. Don't make us come over there.

Mexifornia High School Exit Exams Update
Source: San Francisco Chronicle [05/24/06]

In a 4-3 decision, Mexifornia's Supreme Court, narrowly, restored the results of the state's high school exit exam, putting the graduation of 46,768 high school seniors in jeopardy. The ruling sets aside a lower court decision that suspended the a state educrap requirement that made passing the exit exam a graduation prerequisite.

Arturo Gonzales, a Gulag shyster who ran this notion up the legal system flagpole on behalf of his Colonista clients was, as expected, far from thrilled spitless. Vowing to take the matter to the 9th Circus Court of Appeals, he whined:

"If the constitutional rights of our children are violated, we cannot punish them further by depriving them of a diploma that they have rightfully earned by passing all required courses."

Yeah, right dude, your "passed every required course" clients can't cope with 10th grade English and 8th grade math. Maybe if your Colonista clients spoke ENGLISH, they'd wouldn't be in this fix.

Update:
Shyster Gonzales took his whining to the 9th Circus, but the results are, at best, mixed. The 9th Circuit Court of Appeals agreed to hear the case, but they won't get around to it until July.

Mexifornia's Legicrats Get One Right?
Source: PIG News Wire [05/11/06]

In a rare moment of unanimity, the perpetually feuding members of Mexifornia's Assembly set aside their squabbling to pass a bill that extends First Amendment protections to college journalists. The vote - one that might never happen again - was 76-0, a tally that has us thisclose to checking the Sacramento drinking water supply for banned substances. The bill was prompted by a 7th U.S. Court of Appeals decision that gave Ivory Tower administrators a green light to "review college student articles before publication".

The bill, AB2581 does contain some prose that allows Ivory Tower administrators to discipline students who publish "hate speech" and that's not the best news we've heard all day. But, we're willing to take the glass half full view and welcome what appears to be a unanimous vote in favor of journalistic freedom at Mexifornia's colleges and universities. We'll keep and eye on this one and provide updates, if/when something fun transpires.

Mexifornia News Briefs
Source: PIG News Wire [05/03/06]

Sacramento
A certain Mexifornia legicrat was shocked, dismayed and alarmed when notorious lunatic, Twerpy Tommy Cruise, purchased an ultrasound machine to monitor his offspring's development. With nothing better to do, and worried that somewhere, somebody might choose a total wingnut like Twerpy Tommy as a role model, Donkey Clan Assemblyman Ted Lieu authored a bill that would make it illegal for ultrasound manufacturers to sell, lease or distribute their wares to an individual who is not a trained medical practitioner.

We're not shocked that this legicrat dweeb is blatantly shoving his Nanny State nose where it doesn't belong. We're hardly stunned that he's spouting the usual drivel about "public safety" as an excuse to expand Nanny State power. But, he deserves to be booted out of office, right damn now, for daring to think that anyone in their right mind would consider Twerpy Tommy Cruise a role model.

Hercules
The political hacks running Hercules are determined to go toe to toe with capitalist behemoth, Wal-Mart, because Wal-Mart owns 17 acres of prime real estate in their Bay Area blight. The tussle started last November, when Wal-Mart purchased a site with a commanding view of San Pablo bay, then ran a big box store proposal up the city's bureaucratic flagpole. As expected the hacks shot the idea down, so Wal-Mart lowered its expectations and submitted a new, more modest plan for a Wal-Mart outpost on the site:

'...Wal-Mart's new proposal, which is still hotly opposed by some residents, calls for a general retail and grocery store, as well as a pedestrian plaza, two outdoor dining areas and other small shops and general merchandise stores, including a pharmacy...' (San Francisco Chronicle)

Despite the fact that the new Wal-Mart proposal conforms to the city's existing development plans for the site, these Hercules' hacks are far from thrilled spitless. Their object seems to boil down to "Yes, that's what we planned, but it's WAL-MART." Proving how deranged these Bay Area lefties are, the city is now planning to steal the property from Wal-Mart using - you guessed it - eminent domain. PIG News will keep an eye on this looming, titanic battle and bring you all the spiffy details.

APRIL 2006
Mexifornia In the News
Source: PIG News Wire [04/26/06]

More Gulag Games
Determined to punish the Gulag's rapidly shrinking cadre of capitalist "exploiters", the San Francisco Board of Supervisors is running a new Nanny State roadblock up the Gulag's flagpole. If enacted, the edict would ban the conversions of certain apartment complexes to condos if the property owner had the temerity to evict one or more of his tenants. Under this edict, any apartment building where evictions have occurred would be banned - for all time - from converting to condos. Leaving nothing to chance, these Gulag commissars made the law retroactive to 1999. Any apartment owner who evicted (or will evict) a tenant from 1999 until Hell freezes over will be forbidden from converting his apartments to condos.

Presidential Election Fun and Games
Mexifornia legicrats are more than a tad annoyed that the no longer "golden" state is largely ignored when it comes to presidential primaries. Assemblyman Dan Umberg thinks the way to give solidly Donkey Clan Mexifornia more clout in the presidential horse race involves moving the presidential primary from June to January. If it's enacted, Assemblyman Umberg's bill would put the state in contention with New Hampshire as the first primary in the nation. In theory, that would force candidates to campaign in Mexifornia, instead of using it as an ATM machine.

Curiously, this isn't the first time Mexifornia tried to increase it's presidential candidate selection profile:

'...California has tried to increase its clout in presidential elections before by moving up its primary. It held its primary in March in 1996, 2000 and 2004, only to see other states undercut the move by moving up their primaries too. After a low turnout in the 2004 primary, lawmakers voted to return the primary to the traditional first Tuesday after the first Monday in June for this year's elections...' (AP)

Will history repeat itself with another Mexifornia primary belly-flop? You better believe it, Left Coast Sparky.

Mexifornia Legicrats Support May 1st Boycott
In a strictly party-line vote (24-13) Mexifornia's senate 'approved a resolution that names the one-day, May 1 protest the Great American Boycott 2006 and describes it as an attempt to educate Americans "about the tremendous contribution immigrants make on a daily basis to our society and economy."...' (AP). Does this mean that these legicrats will boycott their jobs on Monday May 1st? Sort of. They cancelled their regular business of the state, but, they plan to hold a "check-in session", instead. A check-in session is a brief meeting where legicrats report for business long enough to qualify for their per-diem payment, after which they scurry off to do other things on the taxpayers dime. In this case, they'll book flights to their preferred "support your neighborhood bordering jumping scumbag" atrocity.

Mexifornia Court Gets One Right
Source: San Francisco Chronicle [04/20/06]

A female assistant whose job involved sitting in on the writers brainstorming session for "Friends" only lasted 4 months on the job before the producers cut her loose in 1999. Unwilling to accept that as the final answer on her career in show business, she went lawsuit bonkers and charged the show with sexual harassment due to the sexually-explicit conversations that transpired between the show's three male writers during their creative confabs. "I was sexually harassed" Amaani Lyle whined.

This week the Mexifornia's Supreme Court ruled on the case and as ruling goes it was a show stopper:

'..."While (state law) prohibits harassing conduct that creates a work environment that is hostile or abusive on the basis of sex, it does not outlaw sexually coarse and vulgar language or conduct that merely offends,'' said the opinion by Justice Marvin Baxter.

To prove harassment, he said, a plaintiff must show that the comments were so extreme or frequent that they created a hostile atmosphere at work, for her or for other women. One reason that can't be shown in this case, Baxter said, was that the setting was "a creative workplace focused on generating scripts for an adult-oriented comedy show featuring sexual themes.'' In addition, he said, there was no evidence that the comments were aimed at women or that men and women were treated differently...' (Chronicle)

Mark this one as an entirely too rare win for rational adults in a Mexifornia courtroom. It's "go figure" time in the top secret PIG bunker.

The Fix Is In
Source: Seattle Post-Intelligencer [04/12/06]

Believe it or not, the city of Vernon (Mexifornia) hasn't staged a municipal election in 25 years. This isn't as improbable as it seems, since Vernon only has 86 residents, most of whom are city employees, relatives of city employees or elected officials. The fix, as they say, is in, but that might change if 3 new Vernon denizens get their way.

The fun started with the three newcomers set up residence in a commercial building then filed papers to challenge three of Vernon's incumbent elected tormentors. Things heated up when Vernon officials declared the commercial building "unsafe" then rescinded the newcomers voter registration. Determined to seal the deal, city hacks tried to cancel the election. The three newcomers struck back with a lawsuit that seeks to disqualify most of the city's denizens whom they insist work for the city or are relatives of city employees.

Thanks to a ruling by a Superior Court judge the election and the newcomers' residence were restored and the election proceeded. The chads were punched last Tuesday, but the city officials refuse to count the votes until the on-going litigation is settled.

More Mexifornia Korrectness
Source: PIG News Wire [04/12]

As blatant about her GLAAD BAAGism as she is about her Marxism, Mexifornia State Senator Sheila Kuehl is determined to indoctrinate the state's government cess-school inmates with her GLAAD BAAGism. When it's enacted - and that's a slam dunk - SB 1437 would force the state's cess-schools to teach "the positive historical impact of homosexuals in America". That means, among other things, that the text books adopted by the state, must pass some, as yet unspecified, hurdle that proves the tomes venerate GLAAD BAAGism as the greatest thing since sliced bread.

Only a militant, myopic Marxist like Kuehl sees nothing wrong about imposing her own GLAAD BAAG agenda on the state's cess-schools. She sees nothing wrong with willfully diluting meaningful education with this GLAAD BAAG tripe. And how, you ask, did this unabashed Marxist become a State Senator? Senator Sheila Kuehl is what happens when you let legicrats draw their own districts. Senator Kuehl is what you get when you let the inmates run the asylum.

Mexifornia's Newest Educrap Stinkers
Source: Washington Times [04/07/06]

Mexifornia's Marxist legicrats are up to their old tricks, and this time it's a corker. It's called SB1437 and will, when it's enacted, compel the far from "golden" state's government cess-schools to "teach students in all grades about the contributions homosexuals, bisexuals and transsexuals have made to society' (Times). To further this GLAAD BAAG venerating agenda, the bill requires that the state buy text books which "accurately" showcase "the sexual diversity of our society". Since this bill only needs a simple majority to pass through the state legislature, it's considered a slam dunk for approval. That would leave its fate in the governor's steroid-enhanced hands, a fact that's far from comforting to the usual Culture War suspects.

A second dose of fetid legicrap, AB 606, aids and abets the same GLAAD BAAG agenda:

'...AB 606, which already passed the state Assembly, and is awaiting a hearing in the Senate. That bill would prevent discrimination in California schools on the basis of "gender identification (actual or perceived) and sexual orientation." But AB 606 would also allow the state school superintendent to withhold "all or part" of state funding of school districts that do not establish and publicize "antidiscrimination and antiharassment" policies to protect those sexual groups and make certain teachers are trained to deal with their concerns...' (Times)

Mexifornia's Marxist legicrats would do better to pay more attention to the well-documented fact that the state's educrap system is a complete and utter failure. The state's cess-school system will continue to linger at the bottom of the educrap heap, as long as these Marxist asshats replace the venerable three-R's with this Korrectness on steroids. Is there anything short of a tactical nuclear strike on Sacramento while the legislature is in session that will cure what ails Mexifornia schools? Perhaps, but, we're tired of half measures. Nuke 'em until they glow.

MARCH 2006

Mexifornia News Briefs
Source: PIG News Wire [03/29]

Meathead Takes a Hint
After taking a PR drubbing over his fiscal irregularities as First 5 California's chairman, Rob "Meathead" Reiner finally took the hint and lumbered out of his California Children and Families Commission office, for good. PIG News is more than a tad shocked that he could feel all the political heat through all the insulating blubber he's packing. If you're delusional enough to think that this is the last we'll hear of Meathead, get over it. Anything short of impaling him with one of those Japanese whaler harpoon guns is doomed to fail. If you're hoping that Mexifornia's action hero governor found his missing nads and fired Meathead, we're forced to ask you, "What the hell are you smoking?"

For now, Meathead will try to find something big enough - the planet Jupiter might work - to give him cover while he tries to give Mexifornia another royal shafting, with his new Educrap scheme, Prop 82. Call us names if you must, but we smell another taxpayer funded commission chairmanship in Meathead's future, after the November elections.

More Gulag Games
A Gulag (PIGese for San Francisco, and shame on you for no knowing it) hack is running another aromatic edict up the Gulag's political flagpole, and, as usual, it's a thriller. Supervisor Gerardo Sandoval wants to enact a city-wide edict that would "urge local law enforcement agencies to ignore tough federal illegal immigration legislation if it becomes law". We'd love to tell you we give a damn, but we're honor bound not to lie to you. The Gulag's chad punchers elected this fool, so they damn sure deserve whatever he does to them. That's right it's "they made this Gulag punk hell, so it's only fair that they burn in it" time, again.

Mexifornia In The News
Source: PIG News Wire [03/17/06]

Sacramento
Although, in countless ways, Mexifornia's action hero governor has gone girlie and furtive, we're compelled to point out what appears to be an unwarranted swipe at him. The San Diego Union-Tribune headline screams "Schwarzenegger to Parol Killer Who Became a Priest in Prison". Like any rational adult, I'm far from thrilled when any murdering rat bastard gets turned loose on the law abiding public, even when it occurs in Colonista infested Mexifornia. Intentional or not, the headline is, at best, deceiving.

Assuming the unwary fishwrap reader chills out enough to focus, he, she, heshe or it will discover that the governor didn't pluck this murderer out of his cell and tell him to "Go forth and do what comes naturally, punk". What happened is this. A year ago, when James Tramel came up for parole, the governor exercised his powers and rejected the parole board's decision to parole this "thrill killer". This time out, after the parole board once again recommended parole, the governor didn't review the case, so, by default, James Tramel is turned loose on law abiding citizens.

The usual suspects insist that Tramel is a changed man, since he signed on with Old Ka-Boom as an Episcopal priest during his graybar hotel stint. I don't care if Tramel turned water into Coors and transformed a stale pizza crust into enough pipping hot pizza to feed the entire PIG readership, he's still a killer. His victim is still dead, a crime for which Tramel's partner in murder is still locked inside a graybar hotel. If Tramel has "found the lord", we'll try to be thrilled for him, but he should toil for Old Ka-Boom behind bars where he damn sure belongs.

The bottom line here is this: Arnold didn't pardon this thrill killer. Mexifornia's parole board - egged on by a funny collared scumbag named Rev. Richard Helmer - perpetrated this outrage.

Hercules
The big time fun started in this curiously named Mexifornia enclave in December, when those infamous capitalist exploiters - Wal-Mart - applied for a permit to build a 142,000 square foot store on some property they own in Hercules. It took until February for the city's planning staff to find ample reasons why a jumbo size Wal-Mart store is a crappy idea. The proposed store was, they finally blithered, contrary to a 2003 vintage development plan that put the maximum store size for that location at a paltry 64,000. Unwilling to think small, Wal-Mart yanked their building permit application.

This week, the story inched forward when the Hercules City Council authorized the City Manager to make an offer to buy Wal-Mart's 17-acre beachhead in Hercules. Wal-Mart's designated spokesdolt, Kevin Loscotoff, issued a virtual "Bite me" when he insisted that Wal-Mart still intends to "serve" their Hercules customers by building a store on their Hercules property. PIG News is smelling an eminent domain drama in the making, how about you?

Playing Fast And Loose With Mexifornia's Tax Dollars
Source: PIG News Wire [03/10/06]

In 1998, Rob "Meathead" Reiner scammed Mexifornia voters into ripping off the state's smokers with a 50 cents a pack tax that would - he promised - fund childhood Edcrap programs. As a result, the no longer Golden State set up the "First 5 California Children and Families Commission" then appointed the Meathead as its chairpunk. Since Meathead's state cabal controls 20% of the take from his smokes tax scam, this liberal scumbag has a lot of money to squander on his pet projects. As fun as this sounds, it gets better because Meathead is running another voter initiative up the ballot proposition flagpole. The new initiative would plunder more taxpayer pockets but this time out his Proposition 82 would loot the state's richest denizens to fund universal preschool for all Mexifornia denizens.

Determined to put his Proposition 82 on the state ballot, Meathead used his First 5 commission's funds to promote his new initiative. If you're thinking that sounds illegal, give yourself a cookie:

'...Last month, the Los Angeles Times reported that First 5 spent $230 million -- of the $800 million it has controlled -- on advertising and public relations contracts with firms that had worked on the Proposition 10 campaign. (First 5 Executive Director Kris Perry wants you to know that most of the $230 million went to TV stations, newspapers and other media -- not to the ad agencies.) The Times also reported that, at the very time Reiner was working to qualify his latest brainchild, "Preschool for All," which will be Proposition 82 on the June ballot, First 5 spent some $23 million on ads to promote -- you guessed it -- pre-school for all. That's a no-no. State money is not supposed to bankroll political campaigns...' (Front Page)

Feeling the heat Meathead "took a leave of absence" from his First 5 chairmanship, a very bold new concept since his term as chairman expired in 2004. The only reason he still has the job is the sad fact that Mexifornia's Girlieman Governor hasn't got the nads to replace Meathead. Meathead swears that he didn't do anything wrong. It's just a happy accident that he used First 5 funds for an advertising blitz that promotes preschool at the very time he's trying to get signatures for his universal preschool initiative. What a load of crap.

Update
At press time, there are serious rumblings from the legislature - both sides of the aisle - about an investigation into Meathead's First 5 antics. Additionally, Donkey Clan legicrats who initially supported his universal preschool initiative have withdrawn their support. State Senate leader Don Peralta - Donkey Clan - slammed Meathead's idea:

'...Perata noted that the $23 million campaign was "over the line" and "a blatant effort to promote the initiative." More importantly: Proposition 82 is a bad idea. As Perata wrote to Reiner, "The initiative pays more per pupil for a three-hour educational program than many K-12 schools are able to pay for a full school day."...' (Front Page)

Meathead might look, fat, ugly and stupid, but he still has numerous gullible friends in high places. PIG News predicts that he'll elude the retribution he so richly deserves...again.

Santa Cruz Rolls Out Red Carpet For Colonistas
Source: AP [03/07/06]

Lefty-infested Santa Cruz (Mexifornia) rolled out a "Colonistas Welcome" red carpet that will soon have this picturesque seaside town crammed to overflowing with day laboring border jumping scumbags. The latest "Welcome" mat involves a hot line - in Spanish, of course, because these border jumping scumbag invader bastards flatly refuse to learn English - that invites day laboring invaders to whine about the way their employer for the day treated them. If the employer stiffs some border jumper by not paying, or paying less than agreed, the Santa Cruz cops vow to investigate and punish the employer. Best of all, the border jumper whiner will be protected by the hot line's "I promise not to ask if you're a border jumping invader, so please to don't tell me" rules of engagement.

That sound you hear is a Colonista tidal wave headed for Santa Cruz. File this under "be careful what you ask for, because you might get it" in your PIG News archives.

FEBRUARY 2006

Gulag Gun Ban Delayed
Source: San Francisco Chronicle [02/28]

The Gulag's (PIG-speak for San Francisco and shame on you for not knowing it) frontal assault on the Second Amendment hit a speed bump this week. The judge hearing the NRA's lawsuit to derail the Gulag's ban on owning or selling handguns in San Francisco will be delayed, until at least June 19, to give the judge time to assess the NRA's challenge.

'...The suit claims the voter-approved ban violates a state law authorizing police agencies to issue handgun permits and identifying specific groups of people, including convicted felons, who are barred from owning guns...' (Chronicle)

Under this Gulag lunacy, city denizens would be outlawed from owning a handgun, but that visiting, out of town, handgun packing desperado is street legal. However, if this armed visitor runs out of ammo, he, she, heshe or it would be forced to replenish those bullets outside the Gulag's city limits. As much as we admire the NRA for their determination to protect an individual's right to "keep and bear arms", we're just a tad disappointed that these Bay Area lefties weren't allowed to "reap what they sowed".

Los Altos Bans Frivolous Proclamations
Source: Contra Costa Times [02/19/06]

Tired of the endless politically correct wrangling over the annual "Gay Pride Day" proclamation, the Los Altos (Mexifornia) city council decided to ban all proclamations relating to sexual orientation. Tired of the endless drama, the city council imposed new, unambiguous proclamation guidelines:

'...Proclamations should only be relevant to city business, [Councilman David] Casas argued, or to honor local citizens for good work. The city shouldn't wade into political fights that don't directly affect it, he said, which is why the city declined a request for a Palestinian celebration day...' (CC Times)

Contrary to popular myth, there are a few thick-skinned rational adults living on the Left Coast. Color us more than a tad surprised that a few of them are elected to the city council. It's "go figure" time in the top secret PIG News bunker.

When Is a Gas Tax Not a Gas Tax?
Source: Pagan Scribbler Prattle Tantrum [02/17/06]

According to the News Nitwits, Mexifornia's action hero governor wants to impose a new tax on oil, to help fight global warming. The tree hugger spin here involves that usual pipe dream about "using the money to develop alternative energy sources". Yeah, right, as if we haven't heard that one a million times already. As fun as this is, it gets better.

Sensing that a nasty, table pounding voter backlash was forming on the distant political horizon, the action hero dispatched a spokeswench to quickly assure potential chad punchers that the governor is not going to impose a new gas tax. Swell, until you parse those hackette words. Will there be a new tax imposed? Yup. Will it be added to the existing gas tax? Nope. They'll probably add the tax at the refinery level then let the oil companies take the heat when they pass along this added cost to the consumer. Bottom line, it will make gas prices go up, so, no matter where it's assessed, it's a goddamn gas tax increase. Nice try, Arnold, but we're not that stupid.

Nanny State Lunacy On The Left Coast
Source: PIG News Wire [02/09/06]

Oakland (Mexifornia) City Council
Oakland (Mexifornia) has a litter problem, one that is especially annoying around certain fast food outlets that surround the city's middle and high schools. Given a choice between punishing the fast food junkies who strew litter on the city's streets and plundering deep, fast food pockets, Oakland's City Council dweebs did what comes so naturally. That's right, PIGsters, they nailed the fast food outlets with a tax that will liberate an estimated $237,000 from certain thrilled spitless businesses. The loot stolen from a specific business is based on the capitalist's gross receipts. We can't be the only ones thinking that this reeks of "From each according to his ability, to each according to his need."

These Oakland hacks can spout drivel about "paying for clean streets" until the bovines come home, but we're not that simple. This smells like another excuse to plunder deep capitalist pockets to balance their red ink-drenched books. If they really wanted to address the litter problem, they'd take steps to catch and punish the litterbugs who flunked trashcan 101.

Mexifornia's Department of Toxic Substances Control
Henceforth, thanks to Mexifornia's Department of Toxic Substances Control and the Marxist meatheads running the state's legislature, there are new, non-negotiable rules about trashing certain "e-waste". If a denizen of this Left Coast blight has batteries, cell phones, florescent lights, mercury thermometers, printers, VCR's, answering machines, radios, computers or boob tube monitors that need to be trashed, they're in for a nasty shock. These, and assorted other items must be disposed of in special toxic disposal centers. There's just one pesky problem. Although the law went into effect on February 9, these toxic disposal centers are few and far between. Big, big fun.

This smells like a classic Nanny State "gotcha". Mexifornia denizens are required to dispose of their e-waste in designated toxic disposal centers. But, since those are few and far between, these braindead bureaucrats will do what comes naturally and fine e-waste edict violators for failing to obey a virtually impossible regulation.

JANUARY 2006

Left Coast News Nuggets
Source: Pagan Scribbler Shallow Thoughts [01/25/06]

Dressed for Success?
The crusade to make life as tepid for tykes and teenagers as it is for adults has chalked up another victim. This spring, when the video game industry stages its E3Expo in the City of Angels, the only items being unveiled will be the games themselves. What makes that newsworthy? This year, bowing to the caterwauling about video game sex and violence, the organizers are cracking down, big time, on those hormone-revving booth babes. The new E3Expo "guidelines" are guaranteed to thrill every "but, it's for the children" dweeb from sea to shining sea:

"Material, including live models, conduct that is sexually explicit and/or sexually provocative, including but not limited to nudity, partial nudity and bathing suit bottoms, are prohibited on the show floor, all common areas, and at any access points to the show."

Violators will be warned, once, then fined $5,000 - payable immediately - if they press their luck a second time. Is anyone shocked that the E3Expo's director is female? I doubt it. Rumors that this booty-phobic wench will require booth babes to wear a burka can't be confirmed at press time.

Just What I Never Knew I Needed
The City of Angels' Colonista Mayor, Antonio Villaraigosa, is moving up the Donkey Clan's political food chain at a record pace. According to the usual News Nitwit suspects, he will be delivering the Donkey Clan's Spanish-language rebuttal to this year's State Of The Union address. Are we the only ones who never heard of this Spanish-language rebuttal, until today? Probably, but we're on it, now.

As annoying this Colonista pandering is - and it's very goddamn annoying - there is a silver lining. What silver lining? Actually, there are two. First, L.A.'s city hall dwelling, Colonista pain in the butt could, prematurely, become Amerika's Colonista pain-in-the butt if the Donkey Clan decides to elevate this grinning, photo-op loving fool to Capitol Hill Colonista. Second, and more important, W could lose his place on daddy Vincente' Fox's lap to the Donkey Clan's rising Colonista star. As a direct result, W could - we know it's a longshot - remember, belatedly, that he's President of the United States, not El Presidente of Mexico. It's not much, but we'll take it.

Minutemen Declared "Too Political" For Parade
Source: AP [01/24/06]

The private group that stages the annual Patriot's Day Parade in Laguna Beach (Mexifornia) landed in the spotlight when they turned down an application from two members of the Minuteman Civil Defense Corps to enter a float in this year's parade. Spouting drivel about rules that ban politics - and religion - from the festivities, the committee that runs this parade turned down the application, stating that the group and its founder Jim Gilchrist were much too political for their parade. Just a tad annoyed, Jim Gilchrist is vowing to take the parade purveyors to court:

'...Gilchrist maintains that the Minuteman Project isn't political and that many of the parade's past and current entrants violate the same rule, including a gay men's choir, a peace group and a local center that runs a day laborer center on the city's outskirts. Because of these inconsistencies, he said, his group has retained an attorney and plans to file a lawsuit alleging discrimination and violation of free speech by the end of the week...' (AP)

Is the group running the parade acting hypocritical? Probably, but it's their parade and they can set any rules they want. In this case, despite this pagan scribbler's steadfast support for the Minutemen in general and Gilchrist in particular, I think that Jim and his shysters should back off. Call me names if you must, but I call them as I see them, even when I don't like the way it turns out.

Turmoil In Southern Mexifornia
Source: Christian Science Monitor [01/23/06]

"The Orange County talk is cheap. I want to see how arresting a young 18-year-old girl trying to get a job goes down when robbery and burglary calls for service aren't being responded to. The public will say, 'We've had enough of this.' Let the federal government do its job." (L.A. County Sheriff Lee Baca)

L.A. County Sheriff Lee Baca and L.A. Police Chief William Bratton have their noses out of joint because two Orange County (Mexifornia) police agencies have decided to send their officers to receive special training that will allow them to enforce federal immigration laws. Unlike the City of Angels that continues to turn a blind eye to the Colonistas who infest L.A. in overwhelming numbers, the Costa Mesa (Mexifornia) Police Department and the Orange County Sheriff's Department are willing to do what they can to rid their patrol areas of border jumping scumbags who break this nation's laws.

If L.A. officials insist on letting illegal alien street gangs - like the notoriously violent MS-13 thugs from El Salvador - take over that's on their heads. PIG News salutes these two Orange County police agencies for doing what they can to get violent border jumping scumbags kicked out of our country.

Berkeley In The Crosshairs
Source: Contra Costa Times [01/13/06]

Free speech is not as venerated in Beserkely as it was back in the '60's. Well, it's still venerated, unless you belong to a seafaring cabal within the Boy Scouts of America, called the Sea Scouts. Outraged by the Sea Scouts' rules that ban GLAAD BAAG or Atheist members, Beserkely's city council accused the group of violating the city's anti-discrimination policies then revoked free docking privileges for the Berkeley Sea Scouts at the city's marina. Instead, the Sea Scouts are forced to pony up $500 a month to dock sea going craft.

The Sea Scouts tried to circumvent the city's antics by adopting a "don't ask, don't tell policy" but that didn't fly, so, after going back and forth with city hacks for a while, the Sea Scouts enlisted support from the Pacific Legal Foundation and took the city to court. After losing court battles the lower courts and the 1st District Court of Appeals, the Sea Scouts are poised to state their case in front of the Golden State's Supreme Court. The forces assembled to fight them include Mexifornia's Attorney General Bill Lockyer, the City of San Francisco, the ACLU and the Anti-Defamation League. Good luck, Sea Scouts, you're going to need it.

An Enriching Business Concept
Source: Reuters [01/05/06]

A City of Angels based capitalist named Brad Salzman decided to make life terminally thrilling by hiring aspiring models and actress hotties then dressing them in bikinis, mini skirts or lingerie to park your ride. Brad's idea is so enriching he expects to ring up $3,000,000 in sales in 2006 and is aiming at $14,000,000 by 2010. Brad's primary clientele are movie stars, producers and other entertainment industry players who can request a variety of parking hottie uniforms: lingerie, bikinis, capri pants, camisoles and mini skirts. Brad keeps it street legal by explicitly banning nudity or topless uniforms.

Brad Saltzman is, at present, doing his parking lot beautification in the City of Angels, but he's already planning to expand his business to San Francisco, Las Vegas, San Diego and Phoenix. PIG likes Brad's style so much we just coronated him as our first Capitalist of the Week.

DECEMBER 2005

Nanny State Setback in Mexifornia
Source: News Max [12/24]

A Mexifornia law that would "protect" tykes under age 18 from being exposed to violent video games starting on January 1, 2006 got derailed in federal court this week. Determining that the two parties challenging the law - the Video Software Dealers Association and the Entertainment Software Association - "were likely to succeed" in their lawsuit, U.S. District Court Judge Ronald Whyte granted the two parties a preliminary injunction. It's the fifth time in six years that a federal court struck down state and local laws that impose restrictions on the sale of video games to minors.

The law in question paints a bull's-eye on the capitalist who sell the games, plus those who manufacture them, by imposing fines and labeling requirements. The promoters of these Nanny State regulations insist that - stop me if you've heard this one before - "it's for the children".

Blame Shifting
Source: L.A. Daily News [12/23]

The Facts:

The driver, Douglas Domel, admits that he'd been drinking, was driving too fast and tried to negotiate a curve with excessive speed. His car skidded off the road, hit a dirt berm, making his sports car roll over. An hour after the accident, Dougie's blood alcohol level was still an elevated 0.06, making him street legal, but, obviously unsafe behind the wheel of his high powered ride.

Who he's blaming:

Newhall Land and Farming Company: a firm that is doing some road construction at the site of the accident. The dirt berm which is 10 to 20 feet off the road is there for flood control purposes, but Dougie is suing them anyway because their berm made his ride roll over.

The city of Santa Clarita: Why? Deep, taxpayer pockets of course. He claims the posted speed limit is 50, but city offials, and those at Newhall Land says it's 10 in the construction zone. Dougie blames the city for his stupidity.

Chrysler Corportation: The 2001 Dodge Viper he was driving so recklessly, is responsible for his accident, some damn how. Why? More deep pockets.

The Likely Outcome:

Since a court allowed the lawsuit to proceed, one or more of the deep pockets will pay this lead-footed asshat, just to make him go the hell away.

Arnold Bitch-Slaps Graz
Source: PIG News Wire [12/21]

"In all likelihood, during my term as governor, I will have to make similar and equally difficult [clemency] decisions. To spare the responsible politicians of the city of Graz further concern, I withdraw from them as of this day the right to use my name in association with the Liebenauer Stadium." (Arnold Schwarzenegger)

When Mexifornia's action hero governor refused to grant quadruple murderer Tookie Williams clemency, he did more than ruin Tookum's whole day. In addition to "thrilling" the usual suspects - Mike Farrell, Je$$e, and every Ethnocrat meathead in the no longer "Golden" State - he set off a political firestorm in his Austrian birthplace, Graz. When Tookums got what he so richly deserved, certain Graz pinheads started circulating a petition to have Arnold's name removed from the city's sports stadium. Big, big fun.

Unwilling to put up with that crap from these Austrian whiners, Arnold beat them to the punch with a letter to the city's political hacks. In addition to demanding that they remove his name from the stadium, right damn now, Arnold also ordered the city of Graz to stop using his name in "to advertise or promote the city of Graz in any way". Making his feelings perfectly clear, Arnold returned the "ring of honor" that the city gave him in 1999:

'...The ring was given to him in a ceremony in Graz in 1999. At the time, Schwarzenegger said he considered it "a token of sincere friendship between my hometown and me. "Since, however, the official Graz appears to no longer accept me as one of their own, this ring has lost its meaning and value to me. It is already in the mail."...' (AP)

This pagan scribbler has no idea how you say "bite me" in Austria, but, obviously, Arnold does. For defending his decison so forcefully, Arnold is in the running for our Hero of the Week honors.

Update:

We have two follow-up quotes on the Arnold "Bite me, Graz" epic:

Mayor of Graz

'...Siegfried Nagl, mayor of the southern city of Graz, said he dashed off a letter to Schwarzenegger pleading with him not to return a ring of honor bestowed on him by officials in his birthplace in 1999 and reassuring him that most residents still admire him. "I hope that very soon we'll hear you say, 'I'll be back,'"...' (AP)

Arnold

"Graz will not have problems in the future with my decisions as governor of California, because officially nothing connects us any more. The death penalty is law here, and I have to uphold the law of the land and the will of the people."

PIG
Which part of "bite me" didn't you understand, Graz dude?

Fixing Mexifornia's Prisons
Source: San Francisco Chronicle [12/20]

Thanks to a recent U.S. Supreme Court ruling, Mexifornia's prison crowding problem is on a crash course to a bloody resolution. The fun started in February of 2005, when the nation's highest court ruled that Mexifornia's practice of racially segregating inmates didn't pass Constitutional muster. In a legal settlement that was concluded this week, Mexifornia's prison authorities agreed to stop assigning prisoners cells based on race. Here's the official spin, for those who obsess on such trivia:

'...The new policy states "that race is not to be used as the sole determining factor in housing the offender population. The goal is to ensure the implementation of racial desegregation in a manner that maximizes institutions' safety." (Prison System spokeswench, Terry Thornton as quoted by the Chronicle)

Under this scheme Mexican Mafia gang bangers might get lucky and wind up bunking in with a Crips. A skinhead could end up in a cell with a Blood. What could possibly go wrong?

Another Mexifornia Boondoggle
Source: Sacramento Bee [12/14]

It's a damn shame that Mexifornia's liberal scumbags - especially those in certain tree hugging cabals - don't read PIG News. Why? Because, if they did, they'd be up to speed on the way cities like Los Gatos ripoff homeowners who install solar power gear on their homestead ("Nanny State Greed" 12/05/05). Blissfully ignorant of these facts, these tree hugging dweebs spout drivel about cleaning the air, while they try to bribe Mexifornia taxpayers into going solar. As bribes go, this one is spiffy, because, for starters, the taxpayers are being bribed with their own stolen money. The generous to a fault - with somebody else's money - environmental activists call this steal from Peter to pay Paul scheme "The California Solar Initiative":

'...The PUC [Public Utilities Commission] currently offers $400 million in solar rebates through programs funded by a surcharge on consumer utility bills. The new initiative would expand that amount to $3.2 billion through an additional surcharge over 11 years starting in 2006. Under the program, home and business owners who install solar panels would at first be eligible for a $2.80 rebate for each watt of capacity they install. For example, a homeowner who installs a 2,000-watt system could receive a $5,600 rebate from the PUC. The rebate amount would decrease by 10 percent each year until consumers would only be eligible for a 25-cent-per-watt rebate in 2016. But regulators anticipate that as the market for solar power expands, costs will drop and offset the decreasing rebate amounts...' (Bee, emphasis added)

The last damn thing Mexifornia needs - or can afford - is another taxpayer funded, Nanny State intrusion into the marketplace. But, don't try to tell that to the pinheads who see the Nanny State as the be all, end all when it comes to resolving any perceived problem. If you bribe people into buying solar power through subsidies, the capitalists who make solar power gear have no incentive to find ways to give the consumer a better product for less money. This fact is demonstrated perfectly, by the costs and quality of higher education. Higher education is, largely, subsidized and, as a direct result, the costs keep rising while the quality of the education keeps decreasing. The Ivory Towers have no marketplace incentive to lower costs or improve the product, because the Nanny State keeps throwing more money at them. Computers, on the other hand, are not subsidized, but, thanks to marketplace forces, computers keep getting better, faster, and much more powerful while the prices keep coming down.

Solar power will, in the fullness of time, come into its own, without any Nanny State interference. Sooner or later, as other energy costs keep rising, solar power will reach critical mass, because, comparatively speaking, it will be - bang for the buck wise - a sound, money-saving investment. This change will happen when profit-seeking capitalists find innovative ways to provide a better product at a lower cost. The Nanny State needs to butt the hell out and let the marketplace do what comes naturally.

Nanny State Greed
Source: Contra Costa Times [12/05]

Silicon Valley dwelling homeowners who decide to save money on their energy bill by installing solar panels are in for a rude awakening. It won't get fun until they seek the relevant permits from city bureaucrats. The first fun fact they encounter is that some city hacks make the permit process long, complicated and deliberately discouraging. The second, more annoying, fact is that some city hacks nail you with such hefty fees that the anticipated energy cost savings are gutted. According to a survey by a Mexifornia chapter of the Sierra Club, the fees range from a modest $50 to an eye-popping $1,620. The difference in price has to do with the fee methodology. All those cities on the low end charge a flat rate. Those in the nose bleed range assess fees based on the value of the solar panels and asinine "costs" associated with the permit process.

For the "official" view on these fees, we present this bureaucratic bloviating:

"We're not trying to make money here. We are trying to recover our costs. Certainly solar is a very good thing. But there are lots of good things. There are heating and air conditioning systems that are very energy-efficient. Should we give those people a break? The average citizen then is subsidizing that work." (Bud Lortz, Los Gatos director of community development as quoted by the Contra Costa Times)

Your costs are self-inflicted, assclown. Maybe if you pulled your head out of your butt, you could streamline your bureaucracy the way San Jose has. Their "costs" are a mere $220, and they employ several full time solar panel inspectors. Better still, they manage to get the permit issued within minutes, instead of the weeks/months in your lefty-infested blight.

Setting aside all the spin doctored drivel that high fee blights like Los Gatos ($1,287) and Millbrae ($1,620) spout, we get back to the burning, inalienable liberty question: why should a homeowner be forced to pay this extortion to the city? Why should he pay to make an improvement on his own property that does not impact the city, or his neighbors in any meaningful way?

Afterthought:
You know that cities like Los Gatos and Millbrae are in the bureaucratic Twilight Zone when the tree hugging lefties in the Sierra Club disses them. In their report, the Sierra Club opined that all Bay Area cities should encourage solar power installations by speeding up the permit process and keeping the fees under $300.

Mexifornia Judges' New Scheme
Source: San Francisco Chronicle [12/03]

Mexifornia's judges borrowed a page from the Mexifornia legicrat playbook and devised a scheme that would immunize them from the political slings and arrows launched by outraged citizens. Their scam has two primary goals: locked in budgets and enhanced job security. Here are a few of the fetid facts:

Job Security I: Under their proposal, newly-appointed judges would get a 6 year, on the job, honeymoon, before they could be called to account in the voting booth. They wanted 10 years, but settled for a modest 6 years instead.

Job Security II: If appointed to serve out the term of a State Supreme Court Justice, the newly appointed justice would get a two-year honeymoon, before taking his, her, hisher or its chances at the ballot box for the full 12-year term.

Locked in revenue: Emulating the state's Educrat cabal, these black robed "public servants" would be guaranteed to 'receive at least the same level of state funding as it did the previous year'. In other words, Mexifornia could be flat broke and in hock up to its eyeballs, but these black robes would still get their pound of taxpayer funded flesh.

Self enrichment: Instead of the current salary schedule that is set by state law, a commission would be appointed to set the judges' salaries.

This "we want our cut, damn it", scheme could land on the Mexifornia ballot as a proposed amendment to the state constitution. Before that can happen these black robes need to coerce two-thirds of the state legislature into approve it. Bold New Concept.

Gutless In Mexifornia
Source: Pagan Scribbler Hissy Fit [12/02]

Throughout his long political hack career, a Mexifornia punk named John Campbell, routinely, appeared on KFI's top rated John and Ken show. He checked in with the colorful boom box duo because he liked the name recognition he got from appearing on L.A. radio's 800 pound broadcasting gorilla. Campbell continued that trend during the initial phase of his campaign to win the 48th congressional district's vacant seat, by appearing at a pre-election debate hosted by John and Ken. That was then, but things have changed.

After he failed to win the seat outright, John promised to appear at a second KFI-hosted debate scheduled for the eve of the election. It would give him a chance to face off with his primary rival for the seat, Minuteman founder Jim Gilchrist, one last time before the voters punched those chads. Subsequently, as his lead over his rivals widened, John went girlie and dumped the KFI hosted debate so he could appear on the low rated talk show hosted by VRWC Kool-Aid drinker Emeritus, Hugh Hewitt. Why face a John and Ken interrogation when he could field softball questions from an Elephant Clan toady like Hewitt?

When Campbell pleaded his inability to appear on both shows, due to time and travel considerations, KFI offered to fly him to the debate by helicopter. He refused. They also offered to reset the time for the debate to give him a chance to participate. Again, he refused. They offered to let him participate by phone, or from their studio, but he refused that too. He refused because he's a gutless political punk whose record on border jumping scumbags doesn't stand up to close scrutiny. The last damn thing he wants on election eve is a John and Ken grilling over his border jumping scumbag coddling voting record:

'...In 2000, The Orange County Register reported that Campbell thought illegal immigrants should receive the same benefits as citizens "since the federal government has not controlled the border to prevent the immigrants from coming in." As an Assembly member, in 2002, Campbell voted to allow illegal immigrants in state universities to pay in-state tuition and approved the use of Mexican government-issued ID cards for official purposes...' (O.C. Weekly)

Baring some parting of the Red Sea class miracle, this border jumping scumbag coddling, Davie Dreier clone weasel will win the open 48th Congressional District seat. That might thrill the Elephant Clan open borders cabal, but it's the last damn thing that Mexifornia wants or needs. John Campbell isn't everything that's wrong with the Elephant Clan, but he's a top contender for "why Amerika is screwed" poster punk.

 
© Copyright 1993-2006 PIG - The Politically Incorrect Gazette


 
 
 
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